All heCast episodes

heCast Episode 107

Jordie Taylor on Humility, Wrestling, and What It Means to Be a Man

Season 1 01:23:21 September 15, 2022
Listen now 01:23:21
heCast Episode 107: Jordie Taylor on Humility, Wrestling, and What It Means to Be a Man

About this episode

Episode 107 of heCast features Jordie Taylor in an open conversation about humility, masculinity, wrestling, growth, and the lessons that shape a man.

Jordie Taylor is a standout independent professional wrestler competing across multiple promotions. In this episode, he joins Mike to talk about what he has learned over the years about being a man, the role humility has played in improving his life, and the perspective that comes from growth.

This conversation explores masculinity, discipline, confidence, and how success can look different when you lead with humility.

Listen to heCast, the official podcast of HeChangedIt.

Download the HeChangedIt app for more tools, content, and support on your mental wellness journey.

Read transcript

Transcript supplied via Spotify RSS.

Welcome to. He cast the official podcast of

he changed it as always I am Mike Chisholm.

As always I am excited to be here to talk about all things.

Men's mental, Wellness, before we get going on here, I've got

to be that broken record. We're not there yet.

I don't know how long it's gonna be until I can say.

Hey, if you like what you see, please like share, subscribe,

all of that stuff. I don't know when the he changed

it. Overlords are going to give me

relief from saying that but we're not there yet.

So if you like this program, please show.

So on whatever platform it is that you are in taking this

plan. This this program please like

please share, Please Subscribe, please.

Leave a positive. Comment we would love that.

And of course, if you haven't downloaded the, he changed it

app yet. What the heck are you thinking?

It's To watch how many guys are being affected by this thing and

what my wife and her team are building is it's exemplary, it's

amazing. It's so needed in this world and

I cannot wait for what's in store.

There's lots of things coming in the heat change that universe,

that we are really, really excited to announce here.

Moving forward, big things are happening and I just really

grateful grateful to be part of this experience.

It's a lot of fun. Now, I have talked a couple of

times on this. Upon on this program about some

of the things that I do outside of of this I've talked about my

career a little bit as a financial advisor.

I've talked about some of the other things that I've done in

my background including been part of the pro wrestling

industry. That's right.

We've talked about this in the past.

We've had some guests on from the industry is well and the guy

that I'm going to have on today you can see, I'm already.

We've got it. So you can see both of us today

playing around with the format. Seeing how things go.

What? Like and I just, I got to say

the very, very first wrestling show that I was a part of from a

professional standpoint on the business end of things.

It was a fundraiser that we were doing that people thought we

were crazy, we were putting on an event called Kelowna

Invasion. We brought in an old school, WWF

wrestler called Brutus, The Barber, Beefcake, and people

thought we were not. So we were using it as a

fundraiser for BC at Children's Hospital and people thought we

were Bonkers doing this? What are you doing?

You know, put on a golf tournament.

German or a walk like other you know, regular people do while

we're not regular people so they weren't laughing anymore.

The next day when we raised well, over 15,000 dollars for

the BC Children's Hospital in one night, the guy who were

having on here today was a part of that night and many other

night since that wrestling promotion that little fundraiser

that could went on to raise over a quarter million dollars for

local charities in the run from 2013 to 2019 when we did that.

And He was a part of most of those events.

I will tell you this the business model that we had was

we would bring in a WWE guy or an ex-wwe or WTF guy or gal and

they would kind of be the draw and then we would use wrestlers

from the Pacific Northwest and the Lower Mainland of Canada,

you know, Vancouver area and then locally here where I'm from

in the Okanagan and they would put on you know, it's all about

steak and sizzle. Do you know the the old WWE

wrestler? Many times would be the sizzle

but the steak had to be put on by the substance of the show,

was put on by these amazing athletes.

These amazing storytellers and that's really what a pro

wrestler is. Is there a Storyteller?

They're able to take and manipulate emotions that are in

the crowd and and create a story and really get the crowd around

them to suspend their disbelief and put their emotion into what

they're In front of them, it's like a live-action movie is

really how it is and someone who's really good at this

business is really good at being able to manipulate these

emotions and create these emotional responses of a crowd

live real-time. The guy that I am interviewing

today is a guy like I said, he was part of that original show

and I would submit, that is one of the best pro wrestlers that

you've never seen. And I'm just saying that if

you're not part of the geographic area that we are,

he's an independent Didn't independent pro wrestlers are

some of the hardest working people that you'd ever want to

meet because they hold a career or a job many times while they

on the side bus, their butts quite literally.

And every other part of their body, for this art that they

love so much. This desire to perform Jordi.

Taylor is a guy who has done that.

I've seen him do it, multiple multiple multiple times and it

blurs, the line, man, when you see some of these performers, I

think about actors and you said, Kim Coates.

Sons of Anarchy on he talked a lot about the idea of being an

actor. Me able to blur the line with

reality and fantasy pro. Wrestlers do it real time and

this is one of the best Jordi Taylor.

Thank you for taking time. To be part of he casted.

A man. Thank you, bro.

I'm so much looking forward to it.

I don't really do podcast. And this one is exactly the kind

of that I was wanting to join. I guess it's a perfect way to

express the story and, like my story and help anyone that may

listen to. And that's, that's the main

Point of like my path now is to just help people men and just

like in general just like use my story, whatever the case to help

who's ever willing to listen in wanting to listen or needing the

growth or the help at the time. Okay.

Our first show was in 2013 with you and I would submit that the

words you just said were not in the vocabulary of that guy that

I met 2013, the journey that you have taken is extraordinary.

We're going to get into that today and I'm excited.

Out that let's talk a little bit about where you were though,

because I think that to really appreciate where we are and

where we're going, we need to look back and say this is where

we were that guy in 2013 that I met, I mean, you're jacked right

now, that guy was Jack, you're intelligent guy now, you're

intelligent guy back then, but tell me a little bit about that

guy versus the guy now. Well, I mean, in terms of 2013,

2011 is when I started my career and like, I I've always been a

total pushover because my entire life, like I wasn't really seen

as a child or heard or like made to feel like loved or whatever

the case and it's no one's fault.

Right? It's like, it's all just, again,

like, we're running our programs.

Like I said before we started. But, and 2012 2011, 2012, I just

kind of was like a pushover and I would let everybody walk over

top of me. So, on, in 2013 ish, I started

using steroids because I was, like, I need to get big, he's

got to be big to be a rest, all right.

Yeah, kind of made me, like so to the other end of the

spectrum. So like I went from extremely

nice to kind of rude. Crazy and psycho and like all my

shit out a little bit, it's we're here.

But yeah, what cement its immense podcast, you can say

whatever the hell we want to say absolutely during that time like

2013 I was I was in the middle of like, my transformation of

like, my first getting out of my, I was, I was getting away

from not being seen to being overseen.

Like I was, it was, I was Overbearing.

And like I was still kind of always been kind to people that

are kind back to me. Like I was always, I kind of

just used it as a way to, like, get back at the people who were

rude to me, or didn't see again, didn't see me.

Because I kind of had a thing with that.

But during that time like, you guys were basically, the only

promotion or only people like and I gotta get a lot of credits

or Credence to you. You and Rizzo, like we're the

only people that would give me a chance when no one else really

would. So, it was like, those were the

times, which were keeping the light at the end of the tunnel

when I was in a pretty dark place.

I'm very interested in this perspective and I appreciate you

saying that it's not the first time you've said that to me.

But in this context it certainly is you started wrestling in

2011. Where did you train?

I started Wrestling Academy Lance Storm and Calgary, Alberta

Canada. Okay, so the pedigree of Lance

Storm can be traced back to the heart, the legendary heart

house, and then and and Lance himself went on to a an

incredible career in pro wrestling.

And and then started It up arresting Academy, probably in

many respects considered one of the during its Heyday when you

were there at the time, probably one of the greatest pro

wrestling schools in Canada. That's all fair to say, right.

We're on the same page there. Never seen a better trainer than

Lance Storm and I'm not effective up.

I apologize on that. Yeah.

He's the best trainer I've seen period.

Okay, so good. Okay, so in the ring.

So so you're you, you had the upbringing that you did you

weren't seen boy. I mean, I don't think it takes

the psychologist to go. Okay, well, here's a, here's a

compensation for that. Get into the pro wrestling

world. You go to category, you learn,

you learn the technical elements of of The Craft, I alluded in

the introduction to the psychological elements of The

Craft as well. All the Mind work that needs to

be done, you know that an effective pro wrestler, does you

come back? 2011, and what was it?

That had a hard that had a Difficult time for you.

Getting your foot in the door and getting noticed.

I'm in for in terms of like I went to wrestling school in May

of 2010. So when I came back a couple

months later, I didn't have any money because I grew up

extremely poor so I had to quit my job, but I finally got a good

job right before I went to wrestling school, but I was like

if I get this job, I'm using this to get to wrestling school.

So like I had to quit. And then I went to school moved

to Calgary came back after school.

And then I had six months of not having a job, not being able to

find a job and kind of just getting down on myself.

Because like the I lived in Moines.

Like there was no wrestling and I'm over there wasn't for quite

some time. Funny enough.

There, wasn't any wrestling until six months after I moved

off the island which is just funny how that works.

But ECW was the company. That was like, the biggest

company around, like, Vancouver area.

Yeah, and there was also a SW, but I emailed a bunch of places

and nobody got back to me and then I emailed ECW, but they

had, I guess they ran into a bunch of people who said,

they've been trained by storm but had no experience.

So they were skeptical about people just saying that they had

Trained by him. So that I had to wait for them

to come to Victoria and like, it was just perfect timing that

they just happened to come to Victoria in January of 2011.

It was like, that was my thing. So, I just showed up, because

somebody BJ Laredo was the person that broke me into the

business. Essentially, he brought me to

the show and then Scotty Mac, who's the owner of the company?

He liked was like, oh, you look decent.

You want to be in a triple threat tonight?

I'm like yes yes I do. And then like that mean it was

all just like that simple, even though it was difficult to get

there at the beginning. Well it's funny.

I can I want to A little bit about that because there's a lot

of guys out there right now who are tunnel-visioned and and and

we talked a lot about the different pain points of guys

that would that we go through sometimes.

And one of those pain points is not living our purpose or our

Dream. The thing that we've always

wanted to do and I want to I want to stick on this a little

bit because at the end of the day you did chase a dream

whether it was to be noticed whether it's because you love

wrestling, whether it was that need to perform, whatever it

was, you were chasing a dream. You the dream had a drought and,

and yet at the same time, you kept Focused on it like you know

you look great you are ready for that shot as soon as that shot

arrive. I think that pro wrestlers have

a very unique definition that can be Universal about guys who

are waiting for an opportunity and being ready.

When that opportunity, sometimes shows up because we don't know

when that opportunity is going to show up, do we?

No not at all. Mad - it totally is right, place

right time for a lot of wrestling for the majority of

it. Yeah.

But that's the thing too is like a lot of people spend their time

waiting and I've been victim of A lot myself but like there is a

big against difference between waiting for something to happen

and then going out and making it happen, whatever those steps

maybe like a lot of us do and I've been victim of this, not

victims, like everything you do, you do yourself and do your own,

your own biggest problem. Our own biggest way.

Sometimes in your own, biggest way, whatever the case, I'm

trying to say. But anyways, they're like, yeah,

there's a big difference between, like, waiting for

something to happen then making it happen.

And like, I've been in both and I'm still in both.

I got I, it's hard to get past the waiting, even a day-to-day.

Like, am I doing enough? Am I doing NG too much and it's

always just like a balancing act, right?

Yeah, I hear you but at the same time though, I mean you had a

drought there and you still kept on.

Pushing like you wouldn't, if you hadn't kept working for that

entire six months working on your body, working on, you know,

whatever it is the skill set that you were working on at the

time when that opportunity suddenly showed up, you wouldn't

have been ready for it. And I think there's something to

be said as well for for preparing, whatever it is

preparing for that opportunity and always working hard.

Even if you're working another job, or whatever it is, you're

doing be willing to Out of work on whatever that purpose of that

dream might be. Yeah.

Take the micro steps if need be right?

Like there's different levels of what you need to work on at all

times and like, it can be different every day, right?

Like some days working on your body.

Some days watching wrestling, some days getting in the ring

like everyday looks different. In every goal looks different on

different days. What did it?

Feel like when that opportunity arose and they looked at you and

said, okay, well yeah, hey, yeah, you want to be in the

triple threat match tonight? What did that?

What did that? Feel like that night alone was

kind of funny. Like it was a Not actually the

best debut or whatever the case. So I'm not I wasn't really good

in front of people, I wasn't really good around people, I was

kind of like I was very introverted growing up.

So being around a bunch of people in the first place was

nerve-racking. Being a bunch of her about like

around a bunch of wrestlers and itself, because they're all kind

of like, egotistical big scary looking, whatever the case like

real men, real women, like Fighters and whatnot.

Yeah, so like being around that was already nerve-wracking

enough and I was prepared for just in case that I got the

chance to wrestle, and I've never attend before.

Or really like I got a spray tan and I didn't know when I got the

spray tan, like the person to assist their spring, you

whatever the case and I had boxers on because I thought like

you know, this is high enough so I just pulled them up.

Little did I know? Because I've been wearing trunks

that there would be an inch and a half mark of like, whiteness

from my leg where the boxer like, with my gear the next day.

So, there was that and I tried to sleep like a log and I

drooled on my chest. So there was a white mark on my

chest and like I was already like nervous because a triple

threat is extremely difficult and it's a hard wrestling match

to to be in in the first place. So I like, I had this 10

problem. I'm in the triple threats that's

nerve-racking. I've never been in front of a

crowd before so I'm terrified about that.

My heart's going, a million miles a minute.

And the funny thing enough to when I sister gave me a blank CD

because I was going to put my entrance music on there and it

was like something I've worked on for a few months.

Getting ready for it. She didn't tell me.

There was a song on the first saw the first track, it was

Blink-182, All the Small Things and like that's literally the

opposite of the tone that I was trying to come into the room.

Playing. Yeah, I'm like this isn't my

song they're like just go go and on top of that, my resting name

at the beginning, was the greed father, but they called me the

greed master. So I was like every single thing

screwed up at the times like this is it something?

But at least it's like I got out there and I did it when I did it

after that. Like I just sat there vibin for

like a day and a half you like I did it.

I finally did it. Yeah, it was a breakthrough and

and I again I I think that sometimes the fear of the

performance itself is The thing that overwhelms and maybe even

stopped some guys, from actually, whatever it is,

whether it's learning a musical instrument.

Whether it's getting in shape, whether it's having that

difficult conversation, you need to have or or coming to grips

with the job that they're at many times.

Those fears of what might happen.

Like, if you would have just said the chain of events that

just happen to you. If you would have told the guy

beforehand, that that was all going to happen, those fears

might have been enough to Cripple.

You to not go that night but at the end of the day, what did you

say? Okay, all this shit.

Up and didn't go the way that it was supposed to go.

Wrong music and crazy tan lines, all that kind of stuff, and a

difficult match with all the nerves of that and to perform.

And yet four days after you were vibing about it because you knew

you were leveling up right 100% And like that right there gave

me the courage to I've never really gone over to Vancouver or

traveled anywhere, or do anything is my own.

Because again, like I grew up very poor.

So I didn't have the opportunities to get out and do

stuff and like I had to take care of my sister's a lot of my

life. So I don't really have the

opportunity to like Go out and do things on my own.

So when I, when I did that it was like I did this know.

I can start going over to Vancouver for the first time in

like that was terrifying and itself because I didn't know

where to go. What to do, whatever you thought

I was gonna get lost, didn't have a cell phone at the time,

but it's like that alone gave me the strength to start.

Like, now I can go to this this next level.

I go to Vancouver and I can start heading shows up there and

like that was essentially what started my breakthrough of

wrestling, right? Like it got me to where I needed

to be like, it's just like a step Russian production,

Gresham, like one step at a time, right?

It's lily pads. Across the river.

It's the stepping stones that are there and right now we say

this any guy who's listening to this right now hey what are some

of the stepping stones that you may not see?

What are what are some of those those steps that you could take

to lead you to that better spot that more satisfactory existence

on this planet? You know, those Stepping Stones

were there? They're there for everybody.

Just sometimes we fail to see the awareness, have the

awareness for them. I should say.

And also, you know, you and I talked about this before, I'm

going to get into vulnerability here and then also, Oh, the

vulnerability to to admit or to even search inside that things

aren't exactly the way that I want them to be, you know what

would it look like if they were what they wanted to be?

And what are the stepping stones that will lead you towards that?

And I think those are really powerful questions that every

man, every human really should ask themselves.

I find it very interesting, you're introverted.

There's a lot of people in the pro wrestling business that are

introverted and yet you said it yourself tan line Is that even

boxer shorts wouldn't cover talk about being exposed physically

in front of people, but then also, once you start with public

speaking, which many people fear that, and more than more than

death, how does an introvert Express themselves in that way?

What was it that compelled you to use that as your megaphone?

I mean, it was all just like General progression.

Like I've been cutting promos or trying to Peppermill since I was

16 and the first ones like Uh, trap salute terrible.

A product was a promo is talking to a camera, talking to somebody

and just basically talking a bunch of shit or telling a

story. Making your case for something

is that with that, is that a fair case more or less than,

like hydra-matic hyping the next show, your opponent, talking up

your opponent. All that jazz is like expressing

your gimmick or character, your persona, like, it's extremely

difficult for like it's one of the most difficult things that I

run into and like, for myself, I guess in that sense of like,

just like pushing yourself too. Do the thing that you want to do

like that's it's one of the hardest things that I found for

wrestlers. The majority of wrestler.

So is one of the main things that I focus on since I've

started and like when I first started it was terrifying and

like I didn't get good at it for about like five or six years

until after I was at started doing it professionally and

like, that is terrifying. The whole thing is terrifyingly

resting in front of people and like at the problem that I had

or like that even sometimes I run into still is like the

voices in your head or so loud of like I'm going to screw this

up blah blah blah, right? Like I'm not gonna get this

right. I'm gonna forget this line,

which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, but like the voices in

your head, or so strong and so loud, that you can't hear

anything around you and like that doesn't work in favor for

like listening to the crowd, listening to what you're

actually saying. And like if the Cadence comes

off properly, if like you're making the right pauses, if it

sounds genuine and real and a lot of people want to portray a

Persona, right? Because they're scared to like

let their inner selves out and be seen, which again was a huge

thing that I've had to deal with my whole life, right?

Yeah, it's it's definitely nerve-wracking to say the very

least. What?

Learning to be a pro-wrestler. Jordie was at therapy for you?

Yeah, in a sense it's like it's the only thing that I've wanted

since I was five. It's the only thing I've ever

been in love with. Like, I don't like anything else

and I've never liked anything else.

So it's the only thing that I've since I was five that like, you

can be yourself. You can connect with a crowd,

you can tell a story and again like the crowd part was very

scary and I never thought of that when I was a kid but it's

like I can be myself. I can express myself as full as

I want to and like when I started getting in the ring and

I started to after five or six years learning how to Control

the story control the crowd, like, with the ups and downs in

the flow, like that is. Yeah, it's therapy.

It's like, even when I'm in pain, like I just go out there

and like there's there's no drug or better drug in the world and

I know because I've done them all, so I'm sure absolute best

well and as someone who can attest for this, I've watched

you, I've watched it happen multiple times whether it was,

it was, it was just you, you with a partner, telling a story,

whatever it was where you literally had people in the

past. Of your hand and you got them to

go ho and you just you the ups and downs that you used with

your physical body. But also with the way that you

move the way that you said things the way that you, I've

watched you do it and it's it's art.

It really, really is. It takes a special kind of

artist to be able to do that. So you're in the business for a

while. Again, we want to talk about the

comparison. I appreciate you going into

that. I think a lot of guys don't even

step up to the plate. And I can certainly say, from a,

from a personal standpoint, you know, yeah, financial advisor.

I trade all that kind of stuff, but I know that I'm a

broadcaster in my heart and it, and it's just just going out and

doing these hundred and, you know, somewhat episodes of he

cast so far, I know that I'm fulfilling my purpose.

I got other podcasts that I'm that I'm doing that are that are

that are kind of dream fulfilling and and I just there

are so many men Jordi like in you doing this you want to be

wrestled since we were five, you dreamt of being a wrestler.

I just wanted to be but like the ultimate dream was oh if I could

just be a wrestler and and do this there's a lot of guys who

are listening to this right now that haven't explored some of

those inner most desires of what they want to do.

What would you say to those guys?

Right now you only live once. I mean, if depends on if you

believe that you're reincarnated whatever the case, but in this

Lake okay, every day that you don't take the step is a day

that you live with regret, right?

Like that. The only thing that I've ever

known is to dive headfirst. First into the thing, you love.

See, if you don't, what if I am like, what if is very shitty

place to be in the rest of your life?

Like the only thing we're here to do is live our lives, fill

our lives with love, right? Like, fill our every task with

love the like because what you have inside radiates outside.

So if you love what you're doing in your life, then you're going

to attract nothing but love, and loving the experiences and like

just the happiest most wonderful life you can imagine, right?

But if you're sitting there like regretting, your choice is

regretting, your life hating things, blah, blah blah.

You're going to attract those same kind of like, situations,

right? Like, like attracts, like, So if

you think like all this sucks life is so hard, I didn't get my

chance. You're going to get more things

that like are forcing you to step into your power or further

disassociate into not loving your life, right?

So I mean do it is the thing I would say that's awesome.

I you know another guy that that we know in the wrestling

business has big big a lot of success.

He's been on this podcast and you talked about this is Al Snow

all snow was on this podcast and he talked about how people play

you talk about, what if he talked about how people play?

The what if game the wrong way? All the time, all they do is

they play the? What if game, what, if I don't

get this job? What if I don't have enough

money for the rent? What if I screw this up?

And, and my life will never be, you know, ask that girl out and

she rejects me. What if and you play it the

wrong way and that affects your life and it affects the

trajectory of your life, whereas you could play it the other way.

What if I ask the girl out and she said, yes, you know, or

what, if it's something turned out because of that even better,

what if I didn't get that job? Yeah.

And play the, what if game the other way and I hear that, you

know, imagine if that's all you focus on, if you just focus on,

what if it worked out and I mean that's I'm just I'm just put an

exclamation point on what you say.

But it's interesting that you and Al had both had that to say,

and you did that. And I mean, you talk about.

Okay? So, so from a part-time

independent, professional, wrestler standpoint.

Especially you've had a lot of experiences.

And I mean, I can, I can say, because I've witnessed it, I

watched you. How you have a lot of fun at

after these shows you had, you were living the life.

You really enjoying what this all brought to you safe to say

that you enjoyed it, sometimes to access a hundred percent.

Like that's, it's always been about, like, walking the line

finding the balance, and I'm a Libra, right?

So, I'm all about balance, but when a Libra is out of balance,

they go to extremes. They make irrational choices.

And like, for myself, when I, when I started, I told you like,

I was introverted. I was a pushover.

Everyone stepped on me, because I let them Like I would get in

somebody's way and I would say, sorry.

So like it's hard like somebody will get my way and I would say

stories what I meant? But anyways, like yeah, it would

be the one side where I was very introverted, very scared of

Life, very blah blah. And like I did still choose to

dive into life whatever the case but then as soon as I went to

the other end of the spectrum is like now I'm going to go as hard

as I can and like there was a part of me to that because at

that point not even like when I 33 was about the year that I

started to finally dive into my traumas and figure out what they

were. And like, what Things were

unconsciously running my life, but before that, like when I met

you, that was like, when I was like 25 26.

I was deep deep. Deep into my traumas and like,

trying to escape myself, trying to get away from the things that

I didn't want to look at which were like a very hard upbringing

and I'm not trying to say that in terms of like all my stories,

hard feel like, feel sorry for me, I love everything that

happened in my life and it's a badge of honor now and like it

just, it's part of my story, right?

But like at that time I was as soon as wrestling was over

because that's where identified and that was another big thing

too, was identified so hard with me being a wrestler.

Once I became Like as soon as the match is over, it's like, oh

now I gotta start Escape my life again until the next match.

So it's like let's do everything we can find well and I mean not

to tell Tales out of school, you go to whatever you want to go

into. I had a I just recently had a

conversation with a guy who hung out a lot with John Belushi back

in the day and and and the way that he described John Belushi

is the pedal down to the floor. It does not move and it just

stays there when describing how John lived his life there were

Safe to say that there are time periods where that would be

something that was you could you could relate to.

I would say it's from 23 to 25 till Twenty Eight.

Actually he had a three-year run with it like without taking away

the metal Autumn. Yeah, just very stupid.

I'm surprised. I'm still alive after a long,

but that was part of the story. But like I would, we're all

like, I believe very much that we have a birthday and we also

have a death date, right? Like so whatever we're going to

do in this life is wherever we're going to do.

We're supposed to go when we're supposed to go.

Just like we're supposed to come here when we Come here but like

during that time, like if I didn't, I guess, revamp or like

level up, I guess then I was probably going to party myself

to death. Those probably a pretty strong

Factor pretty strong probability.

Yeah. And, and I mean, it's a, it's an

easy, it's easy to have a hard life when you're running in

those circles constantly in your having those adrenaline highs

and lows and the people around it and stuff, it's really easy

to live a hard life and you've seen it.

I've seen it with people and I love seeing people who come out

on the other side of it and I want to talk about that too.

He said it was in your early, 30s is when you realize you had

trauma and started diving into it.

What was the, what was the Catalyst for you seeing

something bigger? And, and identifying it with

with, maybe trauma or wanting to change or grow.

And I don't want to put words in your mouth but what was the was

there was there one moment or was it a series of moments that

led to that decision? It was definitely a Of moments.

Cause like I would say at 33 was when I had sort of my Spiritual

Awakening where I started to realize that I was running a lot

of unconscious traumas and like that was dictating my life but

there was one specific moment at age 33.

It was like three quarters into it, whatever the case, something

like that, or maybe even the beginning of 34, I don't know

that time doesn't exist to me. Like I'm just like I'm here

right now. Yeah, it was when I was talking

to my girlfriend and I just I kept on, I had this thing and

I've had this thing, like I told you like I used to say, sorry

when I would get in someone's way.

Like, I would say, Oh sorry over everything.

Like I would say sorry constantly like my trauma

response where like I didn't feel good enough.

So it's like as long as I overcompensated and said, sorry.

Constantly then like then it's good right, right.

Like it's also through like you're putting up with me

because I was again never seen never heard of the child and I

didn't really like I wasn't shown that I'm worth something

or means something blah blah blah and again no one's problem,

right? But like I would just say sorry

over everything and like my girlfriend was like I was doing

the dishes and I was helping and then I didn't do something

properly those like sorry. And then she's like doing food.

And I'm like sorry and then like she's sorry.

You say sorry so much like, you know, that's drama response,

right? And I'm like, damn, I don't even

know what a trauma response was. And then I started to like, dive

into what? How many other ones I had like

it's funny too because then I'm like ah shit.

Here's another huge workload. I've got to put myself into to

see like this. I didn't know what they were

right. And I was like, damn, they're

literally running my whole life and it's not.

My problem is no one's problem, right?

It's not, my parents problem is, nobody's really, it's just

that's our story and what we've been given, we can either choose

to continue down that path or start to work through them and

up, Upgrade. I've got two responses to

everything that you just said. Number one, the idea that

saying, sorry is a trauma response.

That's the first one I've on all of the episodes of this podcast

so far. That's one that hasn't come up.

That's really, really interesting.

What is it about saying, sorry, that's a, that makes it a trauma

response. Do not doing anything wrong, and

I wasn't doing anything wrong at the time.

Like I was, I was helping someone, but I always felt that

my being around was a hindrance because like I never felt good

enough for anything like that even worked in.

The right, so like even subconsciously when you're in

the ring, if you don't because I now I am body being the man.

Like I feel very much that I'm the best, but then like I would,

I would fake confidence. But even then like I would, I

would always just feel like I wasn't good enough.

Like I didn't deserve what I had.

Like I didn't deserve to be there, I didn't deserve the nice

things. I was getting even though like

I've always been given everything that I've ever asked

for dreamt of, but there was a part of me that always like, I

don't I don't not worthy of that again.

I guess it's kind of like imposter syndrome, like I'll do

great, but it's like, do I deserve this really?

But then that's the only, like, I would say sorry.

Sorry for everything that is really interesting.

I, we talk a lot about impostor syndrome on here and and I'm

actually there's a side project that's going on with each engine

that's involving with involved with impostor syndrome.

And that's the second thing I wanted to actually ask you, once

you realize what you said there. I think was really, really key

Geordi. I think I'm glad that you said

it the way you did because it triggered this this, this

response. The idea once you realize that

it is a trauma response and suddenly you're like, oh shit,

the amount of work. It's going to tell you, another

thing, like something to work on.

And I think that there's a lot of guys out there who even if

they haven't explored consciously and become aware of

what exactly is some of those traumas fought, some of those

things that are in the background that the lacking is

that we might have in our life. I think many times the idea we

don't want to open Pandora's Box because as the overwhelm, the

overwhelming fear of how much effort, what will change, will

our security be affected? All of these, you know, reality

you know, to its core, the fear of any of that stuff, being

rocked stops us. And I just find it interesting

that when, you know, she's had to go.

That's a trauma response. And there's a part of you that

in retelling a story even goes. Okay, well shit, you know, this

is Anna. Overwhelmed by this here.

Now you're on the other side of it.

Now we're going to get to that in a second here.

But any guy who's got this whole shit, kind of kind of feeling

right now. How worth it is it on the other

side to deal with that stuff, there's literally no better

feeling in the world. Like you, you feel like you're

coming back to yourself, right? Like you have all these programs

and whatever the case and they run your life and you don't run

your life. And that's the problem is like

when you have so many things running your life, you're

triggered at everything and like a lot of men When myself, I'm

the only one that can I know my experience.

So that's what I'm going off of is a lot of men being me.

Aye aye, we try to attack everything from the mind and

like, that's because we have a closed heart.

We've never really learned how to open her heart.

And like, you can't feel from the mind.

So, like, if you have an issue in your head being like, oh,

I've got to deal with all these things, it's because your heart

has to open for it. And like we try to like okay now

I have all these these steps and I can listen to all these

podcasts, whatever the case, because that's what I did.

I just started diving into like Men's Health podcast.

Ever, but it's like you can listen to a lot of things but

instead, you have to be like in the moment and like something

comes up and you be like, oh what's coming up now?

I have to feel this now. Where is this coming from what

sort of like unresolved trauma? Is this coming from as a child?

And like that's the part that really sucks and hurts.

It's like you can't think your way out of feeling like you have

a lot of pain that you have to feel and come up to integrate

and like them. That's that's where the word

comes. I like it's like being in the

moment. It's like, okay.

Like I've learned all these things and now oh and good.

Now I'm prepared for whatever comes up and like something

comes up and you're like, ah shit.

Here's my heart open to a little bit it's like that painful stuff

well and it's painful but also there's also the fear of how

painful it's going to be. When the reality of it is that

it's also moving forward. It's you know it's not still

water. It's like a it's like a river in

you're moving it forward and you might get hit for some rocks

along the way a little bit but you're still progressing versus

when you sit there and it's just still and and because that hurt

is still there, it's just there two different formats in the

form of procrastination. Another form of of, you know,

overworking everything right? Yep.

Yep. Abso-fucking-lutely I appreciate

you talking about that and I mean you know we've had some

we've had some real aha moments that we're going to get to hear.

Now let's go back to your 33 that the that saying sory that

trigger response thing. Sounds like it was a bit of a

keystone to an avalanche continue continue on in the

progression of that hill falling down I mean at that point then I

was like How many times? Because even that triggered me

to. I was like this Little Charmers

fun, so, I'm just being a nice person but like really, it was

just me, like, not feeling worthy, not feeling good enough

and like, I was in the literal place that I wanted to be in,

but my mind thought, like, okay, maybe I should just do the

dishes. Maybe I can like help and do

everything cause that's how I like lived my life, in terms of

like my upbringing with my family.

It's like how can I do things for other people to make me feel

like I'm I'm worth being here. Instead of being like, you know

I'm I'm a beautiful soul. Who deserves all the love in the

world and like this is my Sorry that I've been given by God by

Whatever by the universe, right? Like this is I'm here for this

reason, instead of I don't belong here, I don't deserve to

be here and I Would overcompensate by like doing

everything to make someone's life, so easy that it started

hindering their lives and like because like they need to do

things for themselves to be independent, right?

But that was just my thing and like from then it was like, okay

so I say sorry, a bunch, that's a trauma response.

I like, I overworked myself all the time and I don't rest and I

don't sleep because I feel that if I stop or if If I don't

continue doing things then that's a trauma response because

I'm like, I'm over working there's no balance Within Myself

and I had to start like learning to rest because that's just as

much like it's the yin and the yang, right?

Like you have to rest as much to have to work and I had to like

just just be more in the moment and like stop like learn to

quiet my head and get into my heart and then that was one of

the biggest problems to arise because when you come in your

heart, then you become into the moment instead of like thinking

of like, okay 10 minutes from now, I need to do this 20

minutes from now. This like how can I continue to

make myself worthy instead of that?

I am worthy and ever since then 34, now just about to turn 35.

So it's been like a painful two years but it's been the most

learned two years of my entire life so far.

And like it's it's been the most wonderful two years ever.

Like I would I would go through that pain times 1000, if it

meant to be in the spot, I am now because I got that there's

no better feeling in the world than learning to love yourself

and love your experiences, the love of your life because like,

when you heal your, your trauma becomes your gift to the world.

World then you can help other people with with.

There's right. Yeah, your trauma becomes your

gift to the world. My God does that ever take the

edge off? If you know that you're going to

have trauma? Or, you know, you've had trauma

but understanding the fact that your trauma can be the gift to

the world. You might, you cut yourself a

break a little bit. And I think, I think that's a

lot of us, who can identify with what you're, what you're saying.

We don't cut ourselves a break many times if we're shouldering

the responsibility of a family and you got stresses in the

family, if we're feeling stressed.

What? We're don't want to burden the

family with that stuff, we don't want to burden our friends.

We don't want to. And I mean, that you got these

guys that are living quiet lives of desperation.

I don't how many times on this podcast.

We've used that phrase where these, you know and you you

encapsulated it. So perfectly here, you got this

guy who on the surface, like there are people, I'm not being

hyperbolas by saying, there are people who would look at you.

Jordan say I want to fucking be that guy.

He's jacked whole man. The girls must Is love a look

what he can do and look at what he can do and just use this

larger than life. Kind of the superhero, kind of

guy come to life. And imagine if those guys

realize that that guy they're looking at has worthiness

issues, you know, like if I'll say this, I've watched you

perform. If you've got worthiness issues,

oh my God, it's okay. For all of us to have worthiness

issues and and and it's a it's actually a bit of a natural

thing. Unfortunately, what's happening

is you got a lot of guys were bottling that shit up and We're

going to get to vulnerability because I mean, you know, I

talked we talked before before the red light went on and and

because they're not being vulnerable, that shit, it Stacks

up. We push it down and push down,

push it down, but it comes back up and it, and it comes out,

unfortunately, in horrible ways is, you know, can be violent.

It can be Health shit. That pops up, heart attacks and

and and stroking out and, and then it can be some insane

horrible psychological and mental.

Cool ways that can really make existence difficult.

You've seen it, you've got it, you've got some rock bottom

moments top. Can we can we go into it?

Can we talk about your your path?

That is Led from where you were then to where you are now open

book. No problem.

I was saying that no problem, no problem.

So so when I started my career at 23, I was a total pushover

and this is all because of like just insane amounts.

From never being seed, never being heard, never really

feeling. Like I was loved, whatever.

The case I'm like, again I'll preface by I was constantly by

saying, that's no one's fault because everyone's running their

own programs. But like that was my story,

right? Like, I never really felt like I

was worth anything, so I would let people bully me pick on me,

just do. I like, whatever the case, like

I would just like, just gotta get through this.

I'm the funny guy who just dismantles people's anger at me

by funniness and like, I would that crossed over to the

wrestling business and like in wrestling business, you kind of

have to have a thick skin. You have to be like strong

whatever and I was just the most intense pushover, that anyone

can see like I was scared of everything.

I was terrified of getting heat and heat is like getting in

trouble I guess by like wrestlers are like doesn't it

correctly gossip? You you get afraid of the gossip

because for a variety of reasons, I don't want to make

anyone mad like that. So I would let everyone push me

around and like when I started using steroids, that's when I

went to the other end. It's like, well, now I'm the

psycho now, everything that everyone has ever done to me

including my upbringing. Now I'm gonna bring it out on.

And that even tries to bully me or push me around in the

slightest. And it's like that turned into,

like, okay. So I'm I've always I used

chronic we need to like, I smoked weed like most of my life

because I was trying to hide it from myself and my traumas, and

my story and like all this stuff, right?

Like I wasn't proud of where I've been where I come from all

this. So when I started using

steroids, then I started trying other things.

And like I started like doing every drug.

I could find more less and like that.

Put me on a very destructive path where around like 28 when I

told You that like I started like turning my life around

because that, that from 25 to 28, I was smoking weed.

Every day I was doing MDMA as much as I wanted, I was doing

coke. I smoke crack, I did math, I've

done like every drug. You can think of doing.

Like I was just, wouldn't it. When I started using drugs,

constantly to decide for myself, then I hit a guy adopted a

mindset of, like, okay, I'm just gonna go and tell him 28.

I'm gonna party as hard as I can until that age and I don't

really have a vision past that. So then I just like this I was

so ingrained in my traumas and I was like I'm just gonna party

myself to death, really holy shit.

Like that was conscious thought that you had yes and no.

Like I did admit it to myself one time I think when I was

like, at my like, my mom's getting to my lowest but I just,

I just wanted to just go as hard as I could.

I wanted to be that guy, like I want to just go out looking like

a tough guy, who handled everything and when it's hard as

he could and yeah it put me into a dark place and then like 28,

my nephew was born and I was also injured at the same time.

Like, I had two hernias, so I was literally just like forced

to sit on my coat and do nothing and then my nephew was born to

and like that, I can honestly say that my nephew was the

person that like reignited, my like want to live and like who

Embrace a new side of me or heal myself, I guess.

But until that time like I was just like partying and being a

total dipshit and I would I would do blow every weekend.

I was one of my lowest times ever in that 20. 25 to 28.

I recall smoking crack with a homeless guy, behind a

supermarket like like the stupid things like that, right?

Like I was just the dumbest person and like, it wasn't my

fault. I was just trying to hide for my

life, but around 28, when I started to like I just had

burned all my bridges and wrestling.

I just out asshole to myself out of the business and like I

totally understand. I was a jerk to everyone, right?

Like, but then I was like, left alone.

Like, I had no one, I had nothing.

And it's like, I saw that little guy born and I was like, I got

to be there for this kid because I can't just like let the same

thing happen to me happened to him.

We're just doesn't, have anybody?

That's cool to hang out with them not to say like Doesn't

have family around him but like, no.

It was a another person, who, like, I had a lot of, I don't

know what the word to say is, but like, I guess like made a

lot of mistakes, whatever. But I could help him, not make

those same mistakes. And like, that was another

person that I could, like, show love to and give the love that I

hadn't really received. So, it's totally purpose.

It's 100% of gave you a purpose that you hadn't had previously

and a new definition of purpose, safe to say?

Yeah, very much so. And like little by little after

I had that surgery I was like I'm just going to spend every

single day making the tiniest steps possible to get back to

where I want to be and like so I was like heal from the surgery,

then it's like, okay, now I'm going to start getting into the

gym and then once I started getting the amount of like,

wait, I guess we're like the look that I wanted back because

I had like withered away to like skinny little man.

Just doing drugs all the time. Yeah.

And then I was like, I just once I got to the place where I

wanted to physically, then I started like working on.

Like okay. Now I'm just going to sit down

and watch wrestling and from like 20 17 to 20 of 2017. 19 out

of the, whatever, the case, I spent three years, just sitting

on my couch for almost 10 hours a day, watching wrestling.

Because I was like, I'm just gonna become the best at this.

Now, like I have to, I can either sit at home and be

stagnant and hate my life, and be where I was before, or I can

just work as hard as I can to become what I want to be.

And like, that it very much did reignite my life.

And like that's what started like when I started to embrace

myself and love myself and it's funny to like I was sitting in

my house around like 20 20 19, and I was I was doing mushrooms.

All the time because it was like an organic drug.

And I wanted to like get back into like looking to myself with

like a with a non synthetic drug that I hadn't done before.

Yep. Like I was just sitting in my

house doing push-ups while I was watching wrestling and I just

looked into the mirror and I looked into my eyes and I'm

like, I'm the fucking best. I'm like, I deserve everything

in life. I deserve like all the things

that I've ever wanted in life and it just ignited.

Another thing, it was just like one more spark in the ignition

of like wanting to get back to myself.

And once I started telling myself that and feeling that

like, it wasn't shortly, After that I started winning all the

Championships around and I had four belts on me and then I had

five and then I got a spot and it's a bit of a movie and then

shortly after that I was on, WB Smackdown as like a I guess soon

as I started to believe that I deserve these things and like it

was with accumulated work, and that work was self-love the

right. It was like, I'm going to do all

these things because I love myself and I deserve these

things and like, I deserve all the things I've ever wanted.

They started actually coming to me like rapidly was like, bang,

bang, bang, bang, bang things, beautiful, you know, and I want

to, I want to make sure we do. Get lost in the Weeds on

something like this. If a wrestling promoter is

willing to have you as a representative to the point

where they wrestle for and and win the championship belt of

that promotion, a promoter isn't going to put somebody in the

position to be even working with the champion of that promotion,

never never mind, if they become the champion and become the

representative of that promotion.

I mean attitude is probably every bit as important as the

work ethic in the ring for those types of things to happen and

for you to be a champion of multiple promotions, it

certainly shows that you haven't, you had an attitude.

That was, you know, collaborative and thought and

definitely you thought of yourself to carry yourself that

way for others to see that you've got to believe in

yourself. Would that be four hundred

percent and like, I did jump around there.

Like, I get very excited talking about it now because, like, it's

all it's very exciting stuff, right?

Like to like, sherbet roads, were making all this stuff, but

also, when I was like, taking those steps to like, heal

myself, physically, mentally, it's sort of like watching

wrestling and whatever. The case, I also started to,

because I had to come back to wrestling, right?

Because I took the only during that time in which I was at,

like, my lowest funny enough and like, again, this is why I say

that you and like Rizzo were somewhat, like, The Guiding

lights. You were the only guys that

would book me in the only guys that like showed me love.

So it's like, that, that kind of, like, save me to write like

that. Year span from like 2015 to

2017, where I was just at my lowest, being a total idiot, the

time in which you guys would use me.

And book me, like, obviously, I would never be messed up.

Well, I'm wrestling, I would Irish wrestling team work

provide. But during that time, like, I

really had no one and I had nothing like I had my, my one

friend who's never gave up on me, who's Kevin?

Daniel Adonis, he's the one guy that's always been like there

for me. But aside from that, I would say

you guys were the only ones that helped me but because I had

burned every bridge and like made an ass out of myself to

everybody along with helping myself and loving myself and

getting My place back to her where I wanted to be, I had to

like start mending fences and building bridges in like

extending help and to every person that like wanted or

needed it. Like if I saw somebody that was

like having a hard time getting bullied, where were the case?

I would go over and help me like anything you need any time.

So I started opening my doors to any person that ever needed any

kind of like help. So I kind of gained a reputation

for being like that guy that will help you and like help you

like see through the problems that you need or breakthrough

where you need to and wrestling. And because I always had a mind

for wrestling not to, like, talk myself up but I know I'm I've

got a genius mind when it comes to wrestling.

I don't know anything outside of wrestling but I'm a genius in

wrestling. So I would use that to help

people and like because of that I kind of got a reputation of

like again like helping people and people saw that like

promoter saw that and like, obviously I was working on

myself in terms of like my in ring I was laser focused.

I was finally starting to embody what I'd always believed that I

could and like people started seeing that noticing that and

then putting Faith behind me, putting faith in me.

And then, yeah, before I knew it, I had everything I ever

wanted and is like, I don't really see many people around

here that can have 45 belts at a time.

Like I said, there's not a lot of promotions necessarily easy,

right? And like the Pacific Northwest

is kind of like, the black hole of wrestling that we're kind of,

in our own little bubble here. So, to win the money belts, that

quickly was kind of unheard of and like, it just made me feel

like, okay. I literally, I have the power

within me and I can do these things.

Like an I can take what I want in this life, because I deserve

it, but again, I hadn't got to my traumas yet, but that was my

first step of like, if I love myself and I show myself what I,

what I want and take My wand and know that I can take it, then I

can take it and I got it. Well I got a few reai.

Few reactions to what you just said number one.

Yeah. We're not even talking about the

time where you've, you know you've had some some some other

eye-opening experiences since then.

But again they're all stepping stones that lead to this, right?

I want to go back to when you said you would burn Bridges with

everybody and all that. And I appreciate you saying that

about us and what not, we always came from the perspective and

then this is this is a life thing for me.

I don't enjoy. Ting under gossip and pretense

and and and and I also don't enjoy when somebody tries to

assassinate somebody's character, especially if it's

one that I don't have that experience with that person.

So, so for you and us, you never burned a bridge with us, you

never you never did anything. In fact there was a time where I

think we'd use you two or three shows in a row and I think you

were off one of the, the next shows you showed up and you just

showed up at the say, hey, how's it going?

And shake hands. And and if you got a place for

me to be a part of it and I, you know, I just from that

perspective for me, you always had the attitude of somebody who

was a hustler and going for it and what not?

And if Bridges were being burdened other places we

certainly, you know, didn't you never burn a bridge with us?

So so, you know, for guys out there who are in that in that

place right now, where you think the whole world might be against

you, it's not necessarily the case and And just go and start

being a better version of yourself and see what doors are

actually still open. So I wanted to make sure I

respond that way because that's a two-way street and Jordi.

It really is and you never, we always loved you.

And again, you always put on such a good show, you are the

man. When it comes to this stuff, I

love how you started talking about the generosity and giving

and whatnot. You know, there's a Zig Ziglar

quote out there where you say that says, if you help other

people accomplish your goals and dreams, you'll accomplish Goals

and dreams and that's and I think that that's a life thing.

I don't think that necessarily has to translate to specific

things it might. But but at the end of the day

there's there's no feeling that feels so good then to help

others and the the selfishness from it or the seemingly

selfishness part, is you get your cup filled by helping to

fill other people's cups. And I know you live.

That I know that's who you are and that's what's in your heart

and I appreciate that about you. So you've got You know, you've

got these belts, all the stuffs happening covid hits and and

we're getting into that we're getting into that that that age

of 33 here. Where there's been some

breakthrough moments. You were walking along the path

along the way you were seeing Improvement, recognizing

overcoming, some of the things that yourself built for you, the

obstacles that you self imposed on yourself and you've had some

moments in our you've smashed through those obstacles.

What else? Let's let's let's keep moving

forward. To the closer to the present.

So January 2020. Yeah.

I was like, yeah, yeah. Uh, January 2020.

I was in a table or a four-way Tables, Ladders and Chairs

match. And it was like, when I was just

like, I was, I had taken everything I've ever wanted.

Like I was on top of the world and like I had like a meteoric

rise in a sense. Right?

Like around in DC and like I just went from like midcard.

Nobody eat. I was on the top of the card

everywhere. Yeah and I got was in a fatal,

four-way TLC match. And in that match I it was It

was a very stupid like it anything that happened in

wrestling, right? Like it's way she goes and I

don't blame anyone for it because like I put my.

So you put yourself in the position to have these things

happen to you. But so there was me and this

guy, we were sitting beside each other.

Another wrestler, we're in the middle of the match.

We're five minutes in and there's a ladder place like

right here along us, right? And like, it's on the center of

my sternum and I had my arms up and like, to protect myself,

just because it's a ladder coming down to you, got to be

smart, right? Like I should have put my arms

down here and it was two people that were over 200 pounds.

Be under 50 pounds, right? They both, Down on the same time

and it caved in my chest. And it was literally, the worst

like worst pain I've ever felt. And I had to, I didn't have to,

but I'm not going to not finish the match.

So I wrestled 15 more minutes with it.

And like, it was fucked up, man. It was brutal.

If there was a literal dent in my chest, and it's the worst

pain I've ever felt in my entire life.

And that was the, the absolute Catalyst right there of to,

like, what awoke me from my unconsciousness.

But so I caved in my chest and I finish the match.

I had, I was on WB Smackdown, two weeks after that, and the

cool thing about That not like everything is like just magic

over. Makes anything everything works

as a supposed to flood. So my entire life, since I was

5, the only thing I wanted to do was get on WWE TV and Beyond

every TV and BMW recent with. All right?

Yeah, so I got some Talent or some extra work with them either

be and I got to be on the actual show on Smackdown like a, my

first time. They're like, it's just so cool.

I was security guard and I had a caved in chest.

This is the funny part, it's not funny, but I had a physical

couple days before that. And I had a caved in chest at

the time and I had Act like I didn't hurt at all and like

there's no pain. Like a caved-in chest against

the. It's when you breathe, when you

sneeze, when you lay down, I couldn't sleep.

I couldn't breathe properly for months, and I had to pretend

like I had no pain cuz I'm not missing this opportunity so it

comes to the time and I have a caved-in chest.

I'm not telling anybody like I'm walking down the ramp because

we're supposed to be myself and another security guard and Braun

strowman. This really big dude who was

there at the time the idea is he runs down the ramp and like tack

pulls us and for myself like it. That's my moment right there.

Like, we're supposed to stop the guy, right?

So, I ran to him as fucking hard as I could, and I kick my feet

up and like, I went straight on my back on the, the concrete

more or less. There's a little padding in

between, but like so I hit my fucking head.

And I got a concussion on top of it because I like, I went as

hard as I could into, it's okay, then chest concussion, but it's

still like the moment I've been dreaming of so I could care less

that. Guess the thing I've been

working towards so that happens and it was amazing.

And I would do it a thousand times.

Just like, I would go through with the pain that I went

through of like healing trauma and that's not to say that I

don't have a lot of work left to do because obviously, I do,

everyone does. Yeah, but I would go like the

pain, doesn't matter, right? It's like it's the outcome that

you can working in her life for this reason, and once you get

it, it's like I don't give a fuck.

Hey, and I'll do it again, but so that happened and then a

couple weeks later the World closed down, right?

So then wrestling was taken away from me in a sense because like

and that that is literally my whole identity.

So your identity was stripped of you is how you viewed that you

were at the highest. So high that you could be the

momentum was on your side. Not even physical adversity was

stopping you from being the best you.

You could be at that time, that's how it felt and then

suddenly everything stops. And that's another thing with

that to is shortly. After that, I was supposed to go

to Alberta to wrestle a massive legend in the name of Jason, the

terrible. The guy's a psycho like Stampede

Legend crazy guy. Yeah, super cool.

Awesome. But he's fucking scary and I

knew he was going to beat my ass because he's just crazy, and

he's that kind of guy, right? But I'm not trying to say that

in like a mean non complimentary way, he's just a real ass dude

who loves to fight. But so I had a caved in chest

and a couple like shortly. Like I had a caved in chest and

also had a herniated disc in my neck and that was just from

Randomness, right? So like, I was kind of falling

apart and so wrestling was taken away from me, but before

wrestling was taken away. And before I had this Smackdown

stuff, I Wait. It might have been shortly

after. Yeah.

Okay. So but a convergence of events

was happening in your life to basically be the Catalyst for

what was going to happen. Yeah.

So like wrestling was taken away.

I was just kind of like left to my own devices to like just be

in the immense amount of pain that I had and sorry the

caved-in chest came before the herniated disc in my neck that's

when wrestling started back up again.

Yeah, but though I had a caved in chest, it was the worst

literal pain I've ever felt in my life.

Life and for three months, that's how long it took me to

pop it back out. And like, I didn't go see a

doctor because like, they're just going to tell me, not to

like wrestle. And even though I'm not

wrestling, right? I'm just, I'm gonna power

through what I'm going to tough guy it, right?

So, I actually popped it out myself and like it was, it was

horrible because sneezing was the worst pain I ever felt

because it would like, pop the little bones out little by

little. So it's like, every time I

sneeze do but like, a little pop, little pop little pop and

yeah, like, it was absolutely terrible.

Here's the funny thing, in that sense like I popped it out to

the point where there was one part that really Still hurt and

it was like a tiny bone. But I knew that if I just like

pushed on it as hard as I could, that I would pop it back out.

So one night I was at home and there's no wrestling.

So I'm just sitting there watching wrestling like normal.

So I just started dancing and I'm like, I know that if I just

attack this part and just like, do the motion like while dancing

that like a tax, it that it would eventually fix itself and

like it hurt to the point where I started crying and I like

sitting there like cry dancing, just like pushing myself and

then at one point like just pushed it as hard as I could it

pop back out and I'm like all the pain is gone.

Like it literally it's fixed. And it was like I was like if

you the pure, the cure for the pain is in the pain, in some

sense is like, so I just I just pushed it until it was, it was

fixed and lick. That was my chest and they don't

try this at home, kids whole new recommended.

Wow. Okay, wow.

All right, so your ailments your homeopathic remedy happen to

work in this case. I listen to my, I've been able

to always listen to my body, even though like my mind was

always loud, but I've always had this kind of like knowing of

where my body needs to go to write help it.

I guess that's from wrestling, like being in tune with your

body because like we're almost always wrestling with some sort

of injury, right? And so like we're going to learn

how to work around it and you listen to your body, whatever

the case. But so with that and I don't

mean to cut you off if you have something.

No, no, you're good, you're good.

You keep going. But so II happen to fix that but

I was still left with the. I have no identity now.

I don't know who I am. I am and Jordi outside of

wrestling has always been. So trauma riddled that.

I didn't feel worthy outside of the Ring.

I only felt worthy when I was in the ring.

I only felt like I was the man in the ring.

So like I had two different. Personas one was like this guy

that I never looked at and like I, when I thought about like,

buying new clothes, buying, whatever the case it was always

like, I'm gonna buy new wrestling girl, but I think

about this for my wrestling guy. Yeah.

And then I had to like oh here's real Jordy.

Here's the guy that no one cared about I didn't care about.

I've never seen because I was never shown To see myself.

So I never saw myself in his like, then I had to like start

getting to know me and then that's when the initiation into

trauma without being told that I had traumas kind of started.

But it was. Yeah, it was probably the like

when I was doing drugs and being an idiot around 28, that was a

low but this was like the lowest of low because it was like now I

really have to get into the pain and I can't mask it.

Imma fucking to, like, do drugs, whatever the case.

But one of the coolest things I ever had happened was that was

January. And so, So I got my timelines

mixed up, so that was January and then I had all this time in

which I had to get to know myself again.

And it was, it was extremely beneficial in the sense that I

finally learned to see myself a little bit.

But so wrestling starts, back up months later and I start

wrestling again here and there. However, I can.

Yeah. And I herniated a disc in my

neck. And so, that was like, when I

caved in my chest, I had like shocks running through my arms

and my legs at all times. And I was losing crank all the

time. And this is another thing too,

though. This this adds the story, this

is the part that I messed up because I could it all just was,

it's been like a blur for the last few years, right?

Up like cool thing, painful thing, sure.

But I caved in my chest and it was the Catalyst to get to that

little bone. I was talking about where I

popped it back in. But so, wrestling started back

up again. And this is before I popped it

back in. I was at a show on the island of

Vancouver Island and I was about to win a belt that night.

So, I had two matches and the first match I was like, I have

to Take it easy because I still have a caved-in chest and I feel

really fucked up and five minutes into the match.

I got pinned hard and it made my chest even worse.

So I hadn't finished that match. I finished the next match and

then I went to my sister's house, and as I was laying in my

sister's house, I was in the most pain I've ever been in to

the point where I was, I thought I was in shock, right?

Cuz I was like, yeah, I was sitting there and I was like,

adjusting myself being like, if I just move this tweak, this

something will happen. Yeah.

And then my chest, like fixed itself a tiny bit, but this is

before, like, it was totally Fixed.

But if it's this up a little bit but since your sternum plate is

connected to your, your your spine, the ribs connect.

I felt it fix on the front but then I fell to go into my back

and down my back went numb. So like, oh my God, yeah my

back's numb, my next numb and like I'm losing fucking pain and

I'm losing feeling on everything and it was just like I sat there

that night and I was like, I don't think I'm gonna wake up

tonight or tomorrow morning. So I'm like, if I wake up, then

I really hope that I get to. But if I don't then I guess that

lived a nice life and I really hope my sister hasn't come to

the couch and find me here. Laying here is like a stupid

question. Why aren't you calling the

ambulance? Why aren't you at that point?

They're submitting to the idea that maybe you need a little bit

of help outside of the hope and a prayer.

I mean obviously it worked out but I'm just curious what it

was. Is it pride?

Is it? Is it?

What is it that stops you from from that?

I identified so hard as being a wrestler and like I still do to

an extent. Like I've come full circle to

the point where I know that I am a wrestler, like, I've But I

want to say that without jumping too far ahead.

Well, I didn't want to stop wrestling.

I knew like, I had like a lot of matches coming up and so like

around that time. So it was January 2020.

When I had my chest caved in it was right after that, in

February. When I was on, WE Smackdown.

I spent the next few months. Healing myself, and then

wrestling started back up again. Yeah.

And so my chest was still, like, my chest was fine, but my spine

was fucked up because I like popped it back.

I popped it into my chest and like, here's the weird thing.

So, I felt my back, like the, the disks or whatever.

I felt like it. Like, work itself up every disc.

So I pop one part of the disk, the next one to move, and I pop

one part of the disc and the next one is moved and eventually

got to the point where, like, right here in my soul, I felt

like a creek there like a like a like a, it was like I try.

So I always like this, I would pop it and I would snap it and I

knew that I had the papa to fix it.

But like so it was like, I popped that part of my chest and

then I pop Then in my spine and then so I was wrestling semi

frequently and then that was that night that I fucked my

chest up even more. So yeah it so that like that

fucked it up to more so and I didn't again I didn't want to

stop wrestling right? Because I had that massive

Jason, the terrible and this is where the timeline I kind of

messed it up. But yeah.

Later on in the year I was supposed to wrestle Jason, the

terrible. And that's when things are

stopped again. So I was about, was set to fly

to Calgary, even though I had a herniated disc in my neck, I had

a fucked-up back because there was another disk that was fucked

up. I was like, I'm gonna get the

chance to wrestle. This legendary guy.

Why, right? So I can't I can't not do that

but luckily probably beneficial for me.

That the flight got canceled because they closed the world

down again for a second time. More or less, right?

Stop the things again. Yeah.

So then I was again, just left to sit there and like I was

sitting with my family just in all this pain and like I had to

wrestle the week after but it was local like it wasn't like

interpreter wasn't provincial. Like it wasn't the fly, whatever

the case. Let's so I was about wrestling

Vancouver Island again and my neck was fucked up.

And like my back was fucked up and I was just There with my

family and like it goes back to my nephew again because he was

older by now, obviously, the city with them.

And I'm like I he was asking me to pick him up and I didn't have

the strength to pick him up. So I was like, she's like trying

to and try to pretend that I don't have any pain and I don't

want to tell my family that goes back to trauma two, right?

Where I was like, I don't feel worthy in the sense of like

telling people. My story, my problem.

So I'm just going to like suck it up and be quiet and like just

just men through the pain. Yeah, and so I was I was sitting

there thinking to myself I'm like I'm probably going to spend

the rest of my life in a wheelchair from this point on.

And I'm going to have to retire from wrestling because like, I

was, I was set that I was going to tell the promoter that I was

going to wrestle for like days later because I couldn't feel

like my limbs. I was like, I'm probably gonna

have to retire. So I just like sat there and

like surrendered and this is the first time I've ever truly

surrendered and I just told myself as like I'm surrounded by

love, I have love everywhere. No matter what.

Like this is the story that I've been given, this is the path.

I'm supposed to be right here, doing this experiencing, this

pain and like, no matter what, if I'm not supposed Be a

wrestler then maybe I can be a manager.

Maybe, I can still do something. Like there's still, there's

still a purpose that I can live here and like I have my nephew

here of my family here, they're still love everywhere.

So I just have to be grateful. And the cool thing was it was

like not five days later because I had to wrestle the next

weekend. I was at work and because like

dancing funny thing enough to when you dance you like you move

stuck, energy throughout your body and my body.

It would kind of just told me to do that.

So I was like, I learned to isolate my neck, like, with,

with like the isolations for dancing.

So I did that and I Like pushed the bone this way and I kind of

met in the middle and it popped my neck back in when I was at

work. And I was like, I literally

surrender a couple days before telling myself that I'd be fine

and then they, they fit like they pop back into place and

they were good. And it's like, I don't have any

pain at all anymore. The pain, like the shooting

fucking feeling of my rent, my arms, and my limbs had stopped.

And I was just, I was good. And it's like I told me like as

soon as I like surrender and stop destroying a force

everything. Then I kind of got my dream back

and was it was one of the most beautiful things ever and who

training, Jordy, you're like fucking Wolverine.

How Your body has the ability to pop its bones back into the

place and put itself in danger, not.

And I were going to go get the healing factor in there and I

mean, I'm not trying to make light of it.

It's crazy. How how that happened?

So was that moment where you realized that there is world a

world outside of at that point what you would constructed?

I mean and there's so many guys who wrap their entire identity

around what they do for a living.

Or their position in their family, the father or husband,

or whatever a duty of some sort. And when you surrender, you talk

about this moment of surrender and how it's not about the

wrestling. It's about all the things that

you were present in that moment and grateful for was there a

catalyst for that? Or it?

Was it just the universe? Just saying, okay, here you go.

It's for you or did you read something to you?

What was the AHA? What was the Catalyst for the

aha moment? Is it just the fact that you

were coming to grips with the fact that you were taking stock

that you actually did have a lot more than wrestling?

Is that is that really what it was?

It was literally just sitting in my sister's living room sitting

with my nephew after I had thrown him up and like, was like

playing with them. I was just sitting with all of

them and he was just asking me to play and I'm like there was

so much love around me. I'm like, how can I not be

appreciative of this and not think about the things that I

don't have in terms of like wrestling?

Like I've lived in awesome wrestling career, even to that

point and I was like, I have literally nothing but love

surrounding me. So how can I not be grateful,

right? And like when I did that, like

when you're, when you were in your grateful, you open yourself

up to Miracles, right? Like you become like on the

vibration for miracles to happen and like I did, that's the thing

is like when I started to just feel the love and love myself

and love what was around me and again, that was right before I

was like, before I started a tackling traumas and like when I

started getting embodying love and feeling loved and letting

myself feel it. So, I guess it was one of the

first times my heart opened. Then that's what happened is.

Like, it was just that moment is like, Sparkle of everywhere.

What am I doing? I would submit that.

You needed to be in this place in order to truly tackle.

The traumas. Yeah, 100%.

I guess. Just, you know, you're another

one of those Stepping Stones were talking about.

Yes sir. Yeah.

I I I love you for having this moment you talk you you know a

lot of folks don't necessarily hear pro wrestlers or guys who

you know have that that stereotypical male testosterone

persona. Talk like this and it's one of

the, it's one of the reasons why, you know, when you and I

reached out a few days ago and I like I want to have guys like

you on this podcast all the time to break through and to talk

about these moments of Awakening and awareness.

And it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside or the

actions of what you have done. When these, when these moments

happen and these moments of awareness show up and we pay

attention and we lean into them and we actually do something.

It's even if it's a baby step at a time to lean into those

moments. How much better Our Lives can

be? I say that myself included, I've

got my own that I've got to lean into as well and it's hearing

guys talk about this stuff. There are so many guys out there

who hear this and will it take this and internalize it and and

the gratefulness I think I think you're exactly right.

Gratefulness is a silver bullet for anxiety.

It's a silver bullet for for when you're uncertain about.

Out things gratefulness is one of those.

It's, it is a silver bullet. It's so important.

And when you have that, and there's so many things that we

can be grateful for that we just overlooked and we're not were

not present and we're not aware and and for you to talk about

this and how it's a simple Act of awareness of the love around

you and how suddenly that it becomes a that Avalanche that we

were talking about. So what did it lead to?

So what traumas have you lean into?

What Awakenings, have you found since that moment?

I mean, it's a, it's been a mountain.

I like I've, I've never really seen myself and like, from that

time that wasn't that was more. So just like getting to awaken

in a sense of like learning that I had all these traumas and then

like I started like I funny enough like I started to like

tell myself but like I deserve wonderful things.

I deserve a wonderful life and I started talking to the universe,

right? Like I started like like having

a conscious conversation at all times mean like Be guidance.

Where am I supposed to go next? What is, what's the next thing

that's for me? And like, just, like I would

affirm that, like, I'm destined for love.

I'm a destine for, like, everything that I've ever wanted

in the so, like I the next thing I said, was like, I want to have

a loving partner like a conscious partner, weight of the

case and lo and behold like a few months later, a woman that I

had a crush on in high school ended up just stumbling in front

of me and was like not like literally but like it's like she

crossed your path like I got That is like, the more I look

back, the more I realized that I had been given everything I've

ever asked for like, that was another thing.

And the like, then like wrestling just started, like

piling up with more cool experiences, more cool

opportunities. And like before I know it, like,

now I'm the man around here like now, I have everything I do.

Like I do the things that I love all the time.

My life is literally just filled with love, but like, during the

things, the traumas that I hadn't liked tackled that I have

now is like, not being seen as I had to start looking at like

They'll feel like seeing myself and seeing that I deserve things

and like, not being, I gotta start going to stop you for a

second. If there's a guy out there right

now, who's feeling, like they're not seen, they're feeling like

they are the man who wasn't there.

What would you say to that guy? Right now, the only love that

you can, the only love you need is the love that you give

yourself, like if your inner child was never seen, it wasn't

your parents fault. It's it's nobody's fault that

they weren't able to give you what you needed.

But as an adult, it's your job to repair it yourself.

And in those moments in which you don't feel, Seen, then you

have to see yourself and like tell yourself that it was no

one's fault and like you're not unworthy, your you're worth

everything that you could ever ask for like and it's not it's

not a problem for you to take up space and take up the things

that you want in your life is like, you deserve everything.

We all deserve everything. We're just, we have so much.

Most of us are in survival mode and we don't know how to even

look at anything because we're just like, okay, how do I need

to? How do I get more food in the

house? How do I pay rent?

How do I do this thing? Like it's not like we just think

that like a when I get enough stuff.

Then I'll be happy instead of being like I just need to decide

to be happy and decide that I need my own.

Like I just need to love myself and know that I deserve love and

know that I deserve anything I've ever asked for.

So, like being seen, you're the only one that can see yourself

truly and we all deserve to be seen.

We all deserve to be loved, right?

That starts with using yourself. Yeah, I love that.

There's a book that I just, I adore called The Power of Now,

by Eckhart Tolle and Love someone.

It's such a it's such a it will make you question the way that

you interpret, everything that goes on in your life, including

what your head tells you and and it gives you tools to kind of

separate yourself from those things and and how you can in

those moments become still and become president and it's it is

a phenomenal tool that can be used and Outlook.

So I want to I want to be cognizant of time.

We're in an hour and 10 minutes and I want to I want to make

sure that we're you know, not taking too much time for our

viewers and listeners but at the end of the day, the

transformation that you have you have gone through from who you

were to who you are now and it's funny, you know, it's I'm going

to, I'm going to be kind of literal here, literally talking

from like like, you know, picture the the the

quintessential athlete in your mind of Ballplayer or what, a

testosterone-fueled individual, you know, over to kind of a Zen,

kind of a Zen, kind of guy, what, not that.

I've watching that happen with you, take us to take us home on

the journey as to where you are now.

One of the things that we haven't explored yet in this

journey here Jordi because it's amazing, the transformation that

has happened in you. The blessings that have come

from it, please please. Yeah, take us to take us.

Take us home in that Journey. That means A lot and I'm sorry

if I talk in jumbles because like there's a bunch of

different timelines. Whatever the case that I we're

good, if there's a bunch of going on.

But anyways, like nowadays, I just now I'm just like, and I'm

not to say that I'm perfect. Everyone still learning, I'm

still learning, but like now, I'm more present than I've ever

been. When something comes up and it

obviously still gets me sometimes.

But like, when something comes up now it's like, okay, what is

this trigger coming up? Like what have I not reconciled

with in my inner child? Like my inner child leading to

be seen in this moment. It's needing to be heard.

Well, There's the things come up.

There are teachers, right? Like when we're having emotions

come up. We're having feelings or

whatever. The case, I get something trying

to tell us like something that we weren't validated with as a

child. And the only thing about

location, we're going to get is by ourselves.

So like now I really just love my life.

Like I know that everything that happens to me, is exactly what's

meant to happen to me for my highest good and like I live

dream. Like my life is amazing.

Like I went from like smoking crack and meth to being like now

my life is amazing. I don't need to hide for

anything and like I did do all those drugs and whatever the

case so I could hide for myself and now Like, I don't want to

hide from myself now. I just want to be right here

living. This magical thing that I have,

which is my life. I'm like I said, the more I do

that, the more like I literally just get everything that I want,

because I'm always in the, the vibration for miracles in my

life is a giant Miracle which is wonderful.

It's phenomenal to hear this Geordi.

I read something. I forget where it was.

We're with the where it was it. I read it.

But actually, you something like candy, it's something that she

wants to help incorporate into the heat change to adapt,

actually. Talking about fear and how fear

if we could look at it, we can identify it.

And if we can put a filter on when we recognize that we are

afraid, or that were uncertain and we say, okay, well what if

this is a gift from the universe meant to teach me something and

you you kind of alluded to that. Um, and it just reminded me of

what candy was saying and how, what if we as men every single

time? Something that brings up

anxiety. Something that brings up, fear,

whatever. What if we could kind of

separate ourselves from the emotion and analyze it and go.

Okay, what's it trying to teach me?

Was it trying to make me deal with from the past you talk

about the inner child? And I mean you know it's funny

childhood traumas childhood trauma, it doesn't it doesn't

have to be that we were physically or mentally abused or

something like that. It could be the way that someone

looked at us wrong on the playground on that day and how

we interpreted it that day. And it created a block of some

sort that can affect us now and only by analyzing like what you

just said like how can this teach me?

What is it trying to tell me? What is this a result of asking

those questions? Jordy, you're a changed guy.

Like you have a very different Outlook than you did and I'm

astounded by it. And and you talking about some

of these behaviors and some of these thought patterns that you

have now certainly are filling in gaps as to how you've made

such a radical mental change. Do you think that that mental

change that adjustment is possible for any guy out there?

Any guy like we're all the same? Really like we all have the same

traumas and not all Typically the same, but we all have the

same challenges. We're all facing challenges, we

all feel Sadness. The same, we all feel love the

same. We all have the same strength

within us. Everybody has the ability to do

it. It's just whether they're

willing to love themselves enough to make that change.

And like a lot of it is, we don't feel safe because we're

not taught how to feel safe, right?

Like but when those things come up, all we have to do not get,

it is my thing. But like I guess the thing that

I do is like I tell myself like I'm safe, I got safe to feel

this. I'm safe to work through this.

I'm safe in my skin right now and like we're not what our

traumas. Gave us like we're we can choose

who we are every day, right? Like we can choose to run our

patterns and run the things that like that we had coming up like

throughout our lives. Or we can be right here right

now and accept everything that's happened to us and then like,

just choose to live choose to love and choose to be grateful.

I've got two things that I want to, I want to bring up and then

I want to take her home if that's okay.

The the first thing is well the second thing is going to be how

do people get in contact with you cuz I think that's really

important. But the first thing, NG before I

do that, when you found out about what my wife and her team

are building this men's mental Wellness platform, this app

prevention in your pocket, they like to call it these tools that

we want to be give for guys to equip them with these skills

that you have learned through the School of Hard Knocks.

When you heard about he changed the, he changed it out.

What is it about that? That's got you.

So excited, it's literally every guy needs like a we're all

taught to be strong, be tough being, whatever the case.

But like in order to be vulnerable, which we all need to

We need to start diving into our things and like, like that's

literally what you're providing is like we all have hard times

and hard lives but like the change comes from within and the

only one that's going to love yourself and give yourself that

changes you. And like you're giving that

awareness. You're giving platform for

people to talk about that same kind of change that they've had

right? Like not only is it wonderful to

listen to but it's also amazing to and therapeutic to get it off

your chest. Like I've never really told the

story of like my upbringing, right?

So like it's just as therapeutic for me to be able to like get it

out finally. Right.

Right. It's, it's beautiful.

At the biggest freedom to have. Yeah, its freedom.

I me and it's funny. The ironic part about it is we

try and, you know, man up by staying tough and not bring it

up and all that. But but really you show that

you're tough by being able to be vulnerable.

That's the ironic part about the whole thing.

The much though, it's a mind. Fuck, isn't it, man?

Like the things that lead to success are the things that

naturally, you know, it's not necessarily intuitive until

you've gone through it and once you Through it it's like oh my

God, how many years did I spend? In your case, you know, not

giving yourself credit for even being there not being seen

goddamn, I mean there's so many guys that that are in that place

right now and we want to help and that what's what leads me to

you are a guy that wants to help.

And at the end of the day, this app in this movement is all

about guys being able to help each other.

We're not therapists, but we're brothers for each other and we

can and that helps that's a lot of the time.

And again, we're not for Those who have have real severe,

things that need to be dealt with, by the, by the proper

channels. Go deal with those things, you

know. But but when it comes to what

the goal for this for this movement is, is, you know, you

do a lot of yoga, guess what chances are, you're not going to

have to go to the doctor for a lot of cardiovascular things and

and or or muscle things or that that being said, it's

preventative. And that's what this movement is

here, where guys can actually talk about this stuff and It can

prevent having to deal with worst things.

Down the line Jordi is a helper Jordi.

At the end of the day, you're still doing what you're doing.

You're out there. If somebody wants to attach

themselves to you or look at what you're doing or reach out

to you, what's the best way to do that?

Jody Taylor on Facebook Jo, RDI, etay Lor, on Facebook.

I'm that's where I mostly on stuff.

Inner-city Mystic is my Instagram and the best pro

wrestlers, my other Instagram. And like that's usually where I

stay as on those. The best pro wrestler.

You're the best pro wrestler on Instagram.

I'm legitimately the best pro wrestler.

There is so I have to label it on Instagram.

When I feel like you're offering is love like it's glove to

everyone like and there isn't a situation that enough love can't

solve, right? Like love is the cure for

everything, whether it's self love, whether it's love from

someone else, trying to help you.

And I could literally all of his like, men just need to embrace

love and like embrace the love within themselves and that's how

you open your heart, right? Like that's all it is, is just

offering the gift of love. I want to finish it right there

that I don't think that there's a better excuse explanation,

exclamation point to put on there Geordi.

I love you brother and I'm so grateful that you, you know, are

are vulnerable enough to talk about this stuff.

Thank you for helping people. I'm so proud of, I hate to say

this about saying, it sounds exciting, condescending.

I'm so fucking proud of you. And and, and it's amazing to

watch where you've come from and and and and where you're going.

And I just I'm on And to be part of it Jordi, thank you very much

for taking time to be on on he casted.

And talk about this stuff. Thank you.

And I love you too, brother. Thank you for having me.

It's been wonderful. Oh, no problem.

They'll K. They finish that quickly.

They got the time goes really, really quick.

It's my favorite time of the week is, when I get to do these

things. I am very, very appreciative of

all of the support that we have gotten so far, with this, with

this, he changed to movement. You haven't seen anything yet.

I promise you that. If you haven't downloaded the

heat, change it up. What the heck?

Are you waiting for? For no matter your persuasion

whether you're an Android or an apple person search he changed

it in the app store, download it for free.

Find get the app sign on in and look at some of the resources we

have. Once again, you ain't seen

nothing yet. This has been another episode of

he cast the official podcast of he changed it.

My name is Mike Chism. Go change something.

Read along with this episode

A source transcript is available for this conversation.

Open transcript

Meet the guest

Jordie Taylor

Jordie Taylor is an independent professional wrestler whose story reflects humility, discipline, confidence, growth, and the lessons that come from pushing yourself in and out of the ring. His perspective explores masculinity, self-development, and how success can look different when grounded in humility.

Read transcript

Transcript supplied via Spotify RSS.

Welcome to. He cast the official podcast of

he changed it as always I am Mike Chisholm.

As always I am excited to be here to talk about all things.

Men's mental, Wellness, before we get going on here, I've got

to be that broken record. We're not there yet.

I don't know how long it's gonna be until I can say.

Hey, if you like what you see, please like share, subscribe,

all of that stuff. I don't know when the he changed

it. Overlords are going to give me

relief from saying that but we're not there yet.

So if you like this program, please show.

So on whatever platform it is that you are in taking this

plan. This this program please like

please share, Please Subscribe, please.

Leave a positive. Comment we would love that.

And of course, if you haven't downloaded the, he changed it

app yet. What the heck are you thinking?

It's To watch how many guys are being affected by this thing and

what my wife and her team are building is it's exemplary, it's

amazing. It's so needed in this world and

I cannot wait for what's in store.

There's lots of things coming in the heat change that universe,

that we are really, really excited to announce here.

Moving forward, big things are happening and I just really

grateful grateful to be part of this experience.

It's a lot of fun. Now, I have talked a couple of

times on this. Upon on this program about some

of the things that I do outside of of this I've talked about my

career a little bit as a financial advisor.

I've talked about some of the other things that I've done in

my background including been part of the pro wrestling

industry. That's right.

We've talked about this in the past.

We've had some guests on from the industry is well and the guy

that I'm going to have on today you can see, I'm already.

We've got it. So you can see both of us today

playing around with the format. Seeing how things go.

What? Like and I just, I got to say

the very, very first wrestling show that I was a part of from a

professional standpoint on the business end of things.

It was a fundraiser that we were doing that people thought we

were crazy, we were putting on an event called Kelowna

Invasion. We brought in an old school, WWF

wrestler called Brutus, The Barber, Beefcake, and people

thought we were not. So we were using it as a

fundraiser for BC at Children's Hospital and people thought we

were Bonkers doing this? What are you doing?

You know, put on a golf tournament.

German or a walk like other you know, regular people do while

we're not regular people so they weren't laughing anymore.

The next day when we raised well, over 15,000 dollars for

the BC Children's Hospital in one night, the guy who were

having on here today was a part of that night and many other

night since that wrestling promotion that little fundraiser

that could went on to raise over a quarter million dollars for

local charities in the run from 2013 to 2019 when we did that.

And He was a part of most of those events.

I will tell you this the business model that we had was

we would bring in a WWE guy or an ex-wwe or WTF guy or gal and

they would kind of be the draw and then we would use wrestlers

from the Pacific Northwest and the Lower Mainland of Canada,

you know, Vancouver area and then locally here where I'm from

in the Okanagan and they would put on you know, it's all about

steak and sizzle. Do you know the the old WWE

wrestler? Many times would be the sizzle

but the steak had to be put on by the substance of the show,

was put on by these amazing athletes.

These amazing storytellers and that's really what a pro

wrestler is. Is there a Storyteller?

They're able to take and manipulate emotions that are in

the crowd and and create a story and really get the crowd around

them to suspend their disbelief and put their emotion into what

they're In front of them, it's like a live-action movie is

really how it is and someone who's really good at this

business is really good at being able to manipulate these

emotions and create these emotional responses of a crowd

live real-time. The guy that I am interviewing

today is a guy like I said, he was part of that original show

and I would submit, that is one of the best pro wrestlers that

you've never seen. And I'm just saying that if

you're not part of the geographic area that we are,

he's an independent Didn't independent pro wrestlers are

some of the hardest working people that you'd ever want to

meet because they hold a career or a job many times while they

on the side bus, their butts quite literally.

And every other part of their body, for this art that they

love so much. This desire to perform Jordi.

Taylor is a guy who has done that.

I've seen him do it, multiple multiple multiple times and it

blurs, the line, man, when you see some of these performers, I

think about actors and you said, Kim Coates.

Sons of Anarchy on he talked a lot about the idea of being an

actor. Me able to blur the line with

reality and fantasy pro. Wrestlers do it real time and

this is one of the best Jordi Taylor.

Thank you for taking time. To be part of he casted.

A man. Thank you, bro.

I'm so much looking forward to it.

I don't really do podcast. And this one is exactly the kind

of that I was wanting to join. I guess it's a perfect way to

express the story and, like my story and help anyone that may

listen to. And that's, that's the main

Point of like my path now is to just help people men and just

like in general just like use my story, whatever the case to help

who's ever willing to listen in wanting to listen or needing the

growth or the help at the time. Okay.

Our first show was in 2013 with you and I would submit that the

words you just said were not in the vocabulary of that guy that

I met 2013, the journey that you have taken is extraordinary.

We're going to get into that today and I'm excited.

Out that let's talk a little bit about where you were though,

because I think that to really appreciate where we are and

where we're going, we need to look back and say this is where

we were that guy in 2013 that I met, I mean, you're jacked right

now, that guy was Jack, you're intelligent guy now, you're

intelligent guy back then, but tell me a little bit about that

guy versus the guy now. Well, I mean, in terms of 2013,

2011 is when I started my career and like, I I've always been a

total pushover because my entire life, like I wasn't really seen

as a child or heard or like made to feel like loved or whatever

the case and it's no one's fault.

Right? It's like, it's all just, again,

like, we're running our programs.

Like I said before we started. But, and 2012 2011, 2012, I just

kind of was like a pushover and I would let everybody walk over

top of me. So, on, in 2013 ish, I started

using steroids because I was, like, I need to get big, he's

got to be big to be a rest, all right.

Yeah, kind of made me, like so to the other end of the

spectrum. So like I went from extremely

nice to kind of rude. Crazy and psycho and like all my

shit out a little bit, it's we're here.

But yeah, what cement its immense podcast, you can say

whatever the hell we want to say absolutely during that time like

2013 I was I was in the middle of like, my transformation of

like, my first getting out of my, I was, I was getting away

from not being seen to being overseen.

Like I was, it was, I was Overbearing.

And like I was still kind of always been kind to people that

are kind back to me. Like I was always, I kind of

just used it as a way to, like, get back at the people who were

rude to me, or didn't see again, didn't see me.

Because I kind of had a thing with that.

But during that time like, you guys were basically, the only

promotion or only people like and I gotta get a lot of credits

or Credence to you. You and Rizzo, like we're the

only people that would give me a chance when no one else really

would. So, it was like, those were the

times, which were keeping the light at the end of the tunnel

when I was in a pretty dark place.

I'm very interested in this perspective and I appreciate you

saying that it's not the first time you've said that to me.

But in this context it certainly is you started wrestling in

2011. Where did you train?

I started Wrestling Academy Lance Storm and Calgary, Alberta

Canada. Okay, so the pedigree of Lance

Storm can be traced back to the heart, the legendary heart

house, and then and and Lance himself went on to a an

incredible career in pro wrestling.

And and then started It up arresting Academy, probably in

many respects considered one of the during its Heyday when you

were there at the time, probably one of the greatest pro

wrestling schools in Canada. That's all fair to say, right.

We're on the same page there. Never seen a better trainer than

Lance Storm and I'm not effective up.

I apologize on that. Yeah.

He's the best trainer I've seen period.

Okay, so good. Okay, so in the ring.

So so you're you, you had the upbringing that you did you

weren't seen boy. I mean, I don't think it takes

the psychologist to go. Okay, well, here's a, here's a

compensation for that. Get into the pro wrestling

world. You go to category, you learn,

you learn the technical elements of of The Craft, I alluded in

the introduction to the psychological elements of The

Craft as well. All the Mind work that needs to

be done, you know that an effective pro wrestler, does you

come back? 2011, and what was it?

That had a hard that had a Difficult time for you.

Getting your foot in the door and getting noticed.

I'm in for in terms of like I went to wrestling school in May

of 2010. So when I came back a couple

months later, I didn't have any money because I grew up

extremely poor so I had to quit my job, but I finally got a good

job right before I went to wrestling school, but I was like

if I get this job, I'm using this to get to wrestling school.

So like I had to quit. And then I went to school moved

to Calgary came back after school.

And then I had six months of not having a job, not being able to

find a job and kind of just getting down on myself.

Because like the I lived in Moines.

Like there was no wrestling and I'm over there wasn't for quite

some time. Funny enough.

There, wasn't any wrestling until six months after I moved

off the island which is just funny how that works.

But ECW was the company. That was like, the biggest

company around, like, Vancouver area.

Yeah, and there was also a SW, but I emailed a bunch of places

and nobody got back to me and then I emailed ECW, but they

had, I guess they ran into a bunch of people who said,

they've been trained by storm but had no experience.

So they were skeptical about people just saying that they had

Trained by him. So that I had to wait for them

to come to Victoria and like, it was just perfect timing that

they just happened to come to Victoria in January of 2011.

It was like, that was my thing. So, I just showed up, because

somebody BJ Laredo was the person that broke me into the

business. Essentially, he brought me to

the show and then Scotty Mac, who's the owner of the company?

He liked was like, oh, you look decent.

You want to be in a triple threat tonight?

I'm like yes yes I do. And then like that mean it was

all just like that simple, even though it was difficult to get

there at the beginning. Well it's funny.

I can I want to A little bit about that because there's a lot

of guys out there right now who are tunnel-visioned and and and

we talked a lot about the different pain points of guys

that would that we go through sometimes.

And one of those pain points is not living our purpose or our

Dream. The thing that we've always

wanted to do and I want to I want to stick on this a little

bit because at the end of the day you did chase a dream

whether it was to be noticed whether it's because you love

wrestling, whether it was that need to perform, whatever it

was, you were chasing a dream. You the dream had a drought and,

and yet at the same time, you kept Focused on it like you know

you look great you are ready for that shot as soon as that shot

arrive. I think that pro wrestlers have

a very unique definition that can be Universal about guys who

are waiting for an opportunity and being ready.

When that opportunity, sometimes shows up because we don't know

when that opportunity is going to show up, do we?

No not at all. Mad - it totally is right, place

right time for a lot of wrestling for the majority of

it. Yeah.

But that's the thing too is like a lot of people spend their time

waiting and I've been victim of A lot myself but like there is a

big against difference between waiting for something to happen

and then going out and making it happen, whatever those steps

maybe like a lot of us do and I've been victim of this, not

victims, like everything you do, you do yourself and do your own,

your own biggest problem. Our own biggest way.

Sometimes in your own, biggest way, whatever the case, I'm

trying to say. But anyways, they're like, yeah,

there's a big difference between, like, waiting for

something to happen then making it happen.

And like, I've been in both and I'm still in both.

I got I, it's hard to get past the waiting, even a day-to-day.

Like, am I doing enough? Am I doing NG too much and it's

always just like a balancing act, right?

Yeah, I hear you but at the same time though, I mean you had a

drought there and you still kept on.

Pushing like you wouldn't, if you hadn't kept working for that

entire six months working on your body, working on, you know,

whatever it is the skill set that you were working on at the

time when that opportunity suddenly showed up, you wouldn't

have been ready for it. And I think there's something to

be said as well for for preparing, whatever it is

preparing for that opportunity and always working hard.

Even if you're working another job, or whatever it is, you're

doing be willing to Out of work on whatever that purpose of that

dream might be. Yeah.

Take the micro steps if need be right?

Like there's different levels of what you need to work on at all

times and like, it can be different every day, right?

Like some days working on your body.

Some days watching wrestling, some days getting in the ring

like everyday looks different. In every goal looks different on

different days. What did it?

Feel like when that opportunity arose and they looked at you and

said, okay, well yeah, hey, yeah, you want to be in the

triple threat match tonight? What did that?

What did that? Feel like that night alone was

kind of funny. Like it was a Not actually the

best debut or whatever the case. So I'm not I wasn't really good

in front of people, I wasn't really good around people, I was

kind of like I was very introverted growing up.

So being around a bunch of people in the first place was

nerve-racking. Being a bunch of her about like

around a bunch of wrestlers and itself, because they're all kind

of like, egotistical big scary looking, whatever the case like

real men, real women, like Fighters and whatnot.

Yeah, so like being around that was already nerve-wracking

enough and I was prepared for just in case that I got the

chance to wrestle, and I've never attend before.

Or really like I got a spray tan and I didn't know when I got the

spray tan, like the person to assist their spring, you

whatever the case and I had boxers on because I thought like

you know, this is high enough so I just pulled them up.

Little did I know? Because I've been wearing trunks

that there would be an inch and a half mark of like, whiteness

from my leg where the boxer like, with my gear the next day.

So, there was that and I tried to sleep like a log and I

drooled on my chest. So there was a white mark on my

chest and like I was already like nervous because a triple

threat is extremely difficult and it's a hard wrestling match

to to be in in the first place. So I like, I had this 10

problem. I'm in the triple threats that's

nerve-racking. I've never been in front of a

crowd before so I'm terrified about that.

My heart's going, a million miles a minute.

And the funny thing enough to when I sister gave me a blank CD

because I was going to put my entrance music on there and it

was like something I've worked on for a few months.

Getting ready for it. She didn't tell me.

There was a song on the first saw the first track, it was

Blink-182, All the Small Things and like that's literally the

opposite of the tone that I was trying to come into the room.

Playing. Yeah, I'm like this isn't my

song they're like just go go and on top of that, my resting name

at the beginning, was the greed father, but they called me the

greed master. So I was like every single thing

screwed up at the times like this is it something?

But at least it's like I got out there and I did it when I did it

after that. Like I just sat there vibin for

like a day and a half you like I did it.

I finally did it. Yeah, it was a breakthrough and

and I again I I think that sometimes the fear of the

performance itself is The thing that overwhelms and maybe even

stopped some guys, from actually, whatever it is,

whether it's learning a musical instrument.

Whether it's getting in shape, whether it's having that

difficult conversation, you need to have or or coming to grips

with the job that they're at many times.

Those fears of what might happen.

Like, if you would have just said the chain of events that

just happen to you. If you would have told the guy

beforehand, that that was all going to happen, those fears

might have been enough to Cripple.

You to not go that night but at the end of the day, what did you

say? Okay, all this shit.

Up and didn't go the way that it was supposed to go.

Wrong music and crazy tan lines, all that kind of stuff, and a

difficult match with all the nerves of that and to perform.

And yet four days after you were vibing about it because you knew

you were leveling up right 100% And like that right there gave

me the courage to I've never really gone over to Vancouver or

traveled anywhere, or do anything is my own.

Because again, like I grew up very poor.

So I didn't have the opportunities to get out and do

stuff and like I had to take care of my sister's a lot of my

life. So I don't really have the

opportunity to like Go out and do things on my own.

So when I, when I did that it was like I did this know.

I can start going over to Vancouver for the first time in

like that was terrifying and itself because I didn't know

where to go. What to do, whatever you thought

I was gonna get lost, didn't have a cell phone at the time,

but it's like that alone gave me the strength to start.

Like, now I can go to this this next level.

I go to Vancouver and I can start heading shows up there and

like that was essentially what started my breakthrough of

wrestling, right? Like it got me to where I needed

to be like, it's just like a step Russian production,

Gresham, like one step at a time, right?

It's lily pads. Across the river.

It's the stepping stones that are there and right now we say

this any guy who's listening to this right now hey what are some

of the stepping stones that you may not see?

What are what are some of those those steps that you could take

to lead you to that better spot that more satisfactory existence

on this planet? You know, those Stepping Stones

were there? They're there for everybody.

Just sometimes we fail to see the awareness, have the

awareness for them. I should say.

And also, you know, you and I talked about this before, I'm

going to get into vulnerability here and then also, Oh, the

vulnerability to to admit or to even search inside that things

aren't exactly the way that I want them to be, you know what

would it look like if they were what they wanted to be?

And what are the stepping stones that will lead you towards that?

And I think those are really powerful questions that every

man, every human really should ask themselves.

I find it very interesting, you're introverted.

There's a lot of people in the pro wrestling business that are

introverted and yet you said it yourself tan line Is that even

boxer shorts wouldn't cover talk about being exposed physically

in front of people, but then also, once you start with public

speaking, which many people fear that, and more than more than

death, how does an introvert Express themselves in that way?

What was it that compelled you to use that as your megaphone?

I mean, it was all just like General progression.

Like I've been cutting promos or trying to Peppermill since I was

16 and the first ones like Uh, trap salute terrible.

A product was a promo is talking to a camera, talking to somebody

and just basically talking a bunch of shit or telling a

story. Making your case for something

is that with that, is that a fair case more or less than,

like hydra-matic hyping the next show, your opponent, talking up

your opponent. All that jazz is like expressing

your gimmick or character, your persona, like, it's extremely

difficult for like it's one of the most difficult things that I

run into and like, for myself, I guess in that sense of like,

just like pushing yourself too. Do the thing that you want to do

like that's it's one of the hardest things that I found for

wrestlers. The majority of wrestler.

So is one of the main things that I focus on since I've

started and like when I first started it was terrifying and

like I didn't get good at it for about like five or six years

until after I was at started doing it professionally and

like, that is terrifying. The whole thing is terrifyingly

resting in front of people and like at the problem that I had

or like that even sometimes I run into still is like the

voices in your head or so loud of like I'm going to screw this

up blah blah blah, right? Like I'm not gonna get this

right. I'm gonna forget this line,

which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, but like the voices in

your head, or so strong and so loud, that you can't hear

anything around you and like that doesn't work in favor for

like listening to the crowd, listening to what you're

actually saying. And like if the Cadence comes

off properly, if like you're making the right pauses, if it

sounds genuine and real and a lot of people want to portray a

Persona, right? Because they're scared to like

let their inner selves out and be seen, which again was a huge

thing that I've had to deal with my whole life, right?

Yeah, it's it's definitely nerve-wracking to say the very

least. What?

Learning to be a pro-wrestler. Jordie was at therapy for you?

Yeah, in a sense it's like it's the only thing that I've wanted

since I was five. It's the only thing I've ever

been in love with. Like, I don't like anything else

and I've never liked anything else.

So it's the only thing that I've since I was five that like, you

can be yourself. You can connect with a crowd,

you can tell a story and again like the crowd part was very

scary and I never thought of that when I was a kid but it's

like I can be myself. I can express myself as full as

I want to and like when I started getting in the ring and

I started to after five or six years learning how to Control

the story control the crowd, like, with the ups and downs in

the flow, like that is. Yeah, it's therapy.

It's like, even when I'm in pain, like I just go out there

and like there's there's no drug or better drug in the world and

I know because I've done them all, so I'm sure absolute best

well and as someone who can attest for this, I've watched

you, I've watched it happen multiple times whether it was,

it was, it was just you, you with a partner, telling a story,

whatever it was where you literally had people in the

past. Of your hand and you got them to

go ho and you just you the ups and downs that you used with

your physical body. But also with the way that you

move the way that you said things the way that you, I've

watched you do it and it's it's art.

It really, really is. It takes a special kind of

artist to be able to do that. So you're in the business for a

while. Again, we want to talk about the

comparison. I appreciate you going into

that. I think a lot of guys don't even

step up to the plate. And I can certainly say, from a,

from a personal standpoint, you know, yeah, financial advisor.

I trade all that kind of stuff, but I know that I'm a

broadcaster in my heart and it, and it's just just going out and

doing these hundred and, you know, somewhat episodes of he

cast so far, I know that I'm fulfilling my purpose.

I got other podcasts that I'm that I'm doing that are that are

that are kind of dream fulfilling and and I just there

are so many men Jordi like in you doing this you want to be

wrestled since we were five, you dreamt of being a wrestler.

I just wanted to be but like the ultimate dream was oh if I could

just be a wrestler and and do this there's a lot of guys who

are listening to this right now that haven't explored some of

those inner most desires of what they want to do.

What would you say to those guys?

Right now you only live once. I mean, if depends on if you

believe that you're reincarnated whatever the case, but in this

Lake okay, every day that you don't take the step is a day

that you live with regret, right?

Like that. The only thing that I've ever

known is to dive headfirst. First into the thing, you love.

See, if you don't, what if I am like, what if is very shitty

place to be in the rest of your life?

Like the only thing we're here to do is live our lives, fill

our lives with love, right? Like, fill our every task with

love the like because what you have inside radiates outside.

So if you love what you're doing in your life, then you're going

to attract nothing but love, and loving the experiences and like

just the happiest most wonderful life you can imagine, right?

But if you're sitting there like regretting, your choice is

regretting, your life hating things, blah, blah blah.

You're going to attract those same kind of like, situations,

right? Like, like attracts, like, So if

you think like all this sucks life is so hard, I didn't get my

chance. You're going to get more things

that like are forcing you to step into your power or further

disassociate into not loving your life, right?

So I mean do it is the thing I would say that's awesome.

I you know another guy that that we know in the wrestling

business has big big a lot of success.

He's been on this podcast and you talked about this is Al Snow

all snow was on this podcast and he talked about how people play

you talk about, what if he talked about how people play?

The what if game the wrong way? All the time, all they do is

they play the? What if game, what, if I don't

get this job? What if I don't have enough

money for the rent? What if I screw this up?

And, and my life will never be, you know, ask that girl out and

she rejects me. What if and you play it the

wrong way and that affects your life and it affects the

trajectory of your life, whereas you could play it the other way.

What if I ask the girl out and she said, yes, you know, or

what, if it's something turned out because of that even better,

what if I didn't get that job? Yeah.

And play the, what if game the other way and I hear that, you

know, imagine if that's all you focus on, if you just focus on,

what if it worked out and I mean that's I'm just I'm just put an

exclamation point on what you say.

But it's interesting that you and Al had both had that to say,

and you did that. And I mean, you talk about.

Okay? So, so from a part-time

independent, professional, wrestler standpoint.

Especially you've had a lot of experiences.

And I mean, I can, I can say, because I've witnessed it, I

watched you. How you have a lot of fun at

after these shows you had, you were living the life.

You really enjoying what this all brought to you safe to say

that you enjoyed it, sometimes to access a hundred percent.

Like that's, it's always been about, like, walking the line

finding the balance, and I'm a Libra, right?

So, I'm all about balance, but when a Libra is out of balance,

they go to extremes. They make irrational choices.

And like, for myself, when I, when I started, I told you like,

I was introverted. I was a pushover.

Everyone stepped on me, because I let them Like I would get in

somebody's way and I would say, sorry.

So like it's hard like somebody will get my way and I would say

stories what I meant? But anyways, like yeah, it would

be the one side where I was very introverted, very scared of

Life, very blah blah. And like I did still choose to

dive into life whatever the case but then as soon as I went to

the other end of the spectrum is like now I'm going to go as hard

as I can and like there was a part of me to that because at

that point not even like when I 33 was about the year that I

started to finally dive into my traumas and figure out what they

were. And like, what Things were

unconsciously running my life, but before that, like when I met

you, that was like, when I was like 25 26.

I was deep deep. Deep into my traumas and like,

trying to escape myself, trying to get away from the things that

I didn't want to look at which were like a very hard upbringing

and I'm not trying to say that in terms of like all my stories,

hard feel like, feel sorry for me, I love everything that

happened in my life and it's a badge of honor now and like it

just, it's part of my story, right?

But like at that time I was as soon as wrestling was over

because that's where identified and that was another big thing

too, was identified so hard with me being a wrestler.

Once I became Like as soon as the match is over, it's like, oh

now I gotta start Escape my life again until the next match.

So it's like let's do everything we can find well and I mean not

to tell Tales out of school, you go to whatever you want to go

into. I had a I just recently had a

conversation with a guy who hung out a lot with John Belushi back

in the day and and and the way that he described John Belushi

is the pedal down to the floor. It does not move and it just

stays there when describing how John lived his life there were

Safe to say that there are time periods where that would be

something that was you could you could relate to.

I would say it's from 23 to 25 till Twenty Eight.

Actually he had a three-year run with it like without taking away

the metal Autumn. Yeah, just very stupid.

I'm surprised. I'm still alive after a long,

but that was part of the story. But like I would, we're all

like, I believe very much that we have a birthday and we also

have a death date, right? Like so whatever we're going to

do in this life is wherever we're going to do.

We're supposed to go when we're supposed to go.

Just like we're supposed to come here when we Come here but like

during that time, like if I didn't, I guess, revamp or like

level up, I guess then I was probably going to party myself

to death. Those probably a pretty strong

Factor pretty strong probability.

Yeah. And, and I mean, it's a, it's an

easy, it's easy to have a hard life when you're running in

those circles constantly in your having those adrenaline highs

and lows and the people around it and stuff, it's really easy

to live a hard life and you've seen it.

I've seen it with people and I love seeing people who come out

on the other side of it and I want to talk about that too.

He said it was in your early, 30s is when you realize you had

trauma and started diving into it.

What was the, what was the Catalyst for you seeing

something bigger? And, and identifying it with

with, maybe trauma or wanting to change or grow.

And I don't want to put words in your mouth but what was the was

there was there one moment or was it a series of moments that

led to that decision? It was definitely a Of moments.

Cause like I would say at 33 was when I had sort of my Spiritual

Awakening where I started to realize that I was running a lot

of unconscious traumas and like that was dictating my life but

there was one specific moment at age 33.

It was like three quarters into it, whatever the case, something

like that, or maybe even the beginning of 34, I don't know

that time doesn't exist to me. Like I'm just like I'm here

right now. Yeah, it was when I was talking

to my girlfriend and I just I kept on, I had this thing and

I've had this thing, like I told you like I used to say, sorry

when I would get in someone's way.

Like, I would say, Oh sorry over everything.

Like I would say sorry constantly like my trauma

response where like I didn't feel good enough.

So it's like as long as I overcompensated and said, sorry.

Constantly then like then it's good right, right.

Like it's also through like you're putting up with me

because I was again never seen never heard of the child and I

didn't really like I wasn't shown that I'm worth something

or means something blah blah blah and again no one's problem,

right? But like I would just say sorry

over everything and like my girlfriend was like I was doing

the dishes and I was helping and then I didn't do something

properly those like sorry. And then she's like doing food.

And I'm like sorry and then like she's sorry.

You say sorry so much like, you know, that's drama response,

right? And I'm like, damn, I don't even

know what a trauma response was. And then I started to like, dive

into what? How many other ones I had like

it's funny too because then I'm like ah shit.

Here's another huge workload. I've got to put myself into to

see like this. I didn't know what they were

right. And I was like, damn, they're

literally running my whole life and it's not.

My problem is no one's problem, right?

It's not, my parents problem is, nobody's really, it's just

that's our story and what we've been given, we can either choose

to continue down that path or start to work through them and

up, Upgrade. I've got two responses to

everything that you just said. Number one, the idea that

saying, sorry is a trauma response.

That's the first one I've on all of the episodes of this podcast

so far. That's one that hasn't come up.

That's really, really interesting.

What is it about saying, sorry, that's a, that makes it a trauma

response. Do not doing anything wrong, and

I wasn't doing anything wrong at the time.

Like I was, I was helping someone, but I always felt that

my being around was a hindrance because like I never felt good

enough for anything like that even worked in.

The right, so like even subconsciously when you're in

the ring, if you don't because I now I am body being the man.

Like I feel very much that I'm the best, but then like I would,

I would fake confidence. But even then like I would, I

would always just feel like I wasn't good enough.

Like I didn't deserve what I had.

Like I didn't deserve to be there, I didn't deserve the nice

things. I was getting even though like

I've always been given everything that I've ever asked

for dreamt of, but there was a part of me that always like, I

don't I don't not worthy of that again.

I guess it's kind of like imposter syndrome, like I'll do

great, but it's like, do I deserve this really?

But then that's the only, like, I would say sorry.

Sorry for everything that is really interesting.

I, we talk a lot about impostor syndrome on here and and I'm

actually there's a side project that's going on with each engine

that's involving with involved with impostor syndrome.

And that's the second thing I wanted to actually ask you, once

you realize what you said there. I think was really, really key

Geordi. I think I'm glad that you said

it the way you did because it triggered this this, this

response. The idea once you realize that

it is a trauma response and suddenly you're like, oh shit,

the amount of work. It's going to tell you, another

thing, like something to work on.

And I think that there's a lot of guys out there who even if

they haven't explored consciously and become aware of

what exactly is some of those traumas fought, some of those

things that are in the background that the lacking is

that we might have in our life. I think many times the idea we

don't want to open Pandora's Box because as the overwhelm, the

overwhelming fear of how much effort, what will change, will

our security be affected? All of these, you know, reality

you know, to its core, the fear of any of that stuff, being

rocked stops us. And I just find it interesting

that when, you know, she's had to go.

That's a trauma response. And there's a part of you that

in retelling a story even goes. Okay, well shit, you know, this

is Anna. Overwhelmed by this here.

Now you're on the other side of it.

Now we're going to get to that in a second here.

But any guy who's got this whole shit, kind of kind of feeling

right now. How worth it is it on the other

side to deal with that stuff, there's literally no better

feeling in the world. Like you, you feel like you're

coming back to yourself, right? Like you have all these programs

and whatever the case and they run your life and you don't run

your life. And that's the problem is like

when you have so many things running your life, you're

triggered at everything and like a lot of men When myself, I'm

the only one that can I know my experience.

So that's what I'm going off of is a lot of men being me.

Aye aye, we try to attack everything from the mind and

like, that's because we have a closed heart.

We've never really learned how to open her heart.

And like, you can't feel from the mind.

So, like, if you have an issue in your head being like, oh,

I've got to deal with all these things, it's because your heart

has to open for it. And like we try to like okay now

I have all these these steps and I can listen to all these

podcasts, whatever the case, because that's what I did.

I just started diving into like Men's Health podcast.

Ever, but it's like you can listen to a lot of things but

instead, you have to be like in the moment and like something

comes up and you be like, oh what's coming up now?

I have to feel this now. Where is this coming from what

sort of like unresolved trauma? Is this coming from as a child?

And like that's the part that really sucks and hurts.

It's like you can't think your way out of feeling like you have

a lot of pain that you have to feel and come up to integrate

and like them. That's that's where the word

comes. I like it's like being in the

moment. It's like, okay.

Like I've learned all these things and now oh and good.

Now I'm prepared for whatever comes up and like something

comes up and you're like, ah shit.

Here's my heart open to a little bit it's like that painful stuff

well and it's painful but also there's also the fear of how

painful it's going to be. When the reality of it is that

it's also moving forward. It's you know it's not still

water. It's like a it's like a river in

you're moving it forward and you might get hit for some rocks

along the way a little bit but you're still progressing versus

when you sit there and it's just still and and because that hurt

is still there, it's just there two different formats in the

form of procrastination. Another form of of, you know,

overworking everything right? Yep.

Yep. Abso-fucking-lutely I appreciate

you talking about that and I mean you know we've had some

we've had some real aha moments that we're going to get to hear.

Now let's go back to your 33 that the that saying sory that

trigger response thing. Sounds like it was a bit of a

keystone to an avalanche continue continue on in the

progression of that hill falling down I mean at that point then I

was like How many times? Because even that triggered me

to. I was like this Little Charmers

fun, so, I'm just being a nice person but like really, it was

just me, like, not feeling worthy, not feeling good enough

and like, I was in the literal place that I wanted to be in,

but my mind thought, like, okay, maybe I should just do the

dishes. Maybe I can like help and do

everything cause that's how I like lived my life, in terms of

like my upbringing with my family.

It's like how can I do things for other people to make me feel

like I'm I'm worth being here. Instead of being like, you know

I'm I'm a beautiful soul. Who deserves all the love in the

world and like this is my Sorry that I've been given by God by

Whatever by the universe, right? Like this is I'm here for this

reason, instead of I don't belong here, I don't deserve to

be here and I Would overcompensate by like doing

everything to make someone's life, so easy that it started

hindering their lives and like because like they need to do

things for themselves to be independent, right?

But that was just my thing and like from then it was like, okay

so I say sorry, a bunch, that's a trauma response.

I like, I overworked myself all the time and I don't rest and I

don't sleep because I feel that if I stop or if If I don't

continue doing things then that's a trauma response because

I'm like, I'm over working there's no balance Within Myself

and I had to start like learning to rest because that's just as

much like it's the yin and the yang, right?

Like you have to rest as much to have to work and I had to like

just just be more in the moment and like stop like learn to

quiet my head and get into my heart and then that was one of

the biggest problems to arise because when you come in your

heart, then you become into the moment instead of like thinking

of like, okay 10 minutes from now, I need to do this 20

minutes from now. This like how can I continue to

make myself worthy instead of that?

I am worthy and ever since then 34, now just about to turn 35.

So it's been like a painful two years but it's been the most

learned two years of my entire life so far.

And like it's it's been the most wonderful two years ever.

Like I would I would go through that pain times 1000, if it

meant to be in the spot, I am now because I got that there's

no better feeling in the world than learning to love yourself

and love your experiences, the love of your life because like,

when you heal your, your trauma becomes your gift to the world.

World then you can help other people with with.

There's right. Yeah, your trauma becomes your

gift to the world. My God does that ever take the

edge off? If you know that you're going to

have trauma? Or, you know, you've had trauma

but understanding the fact that your trauma can be the gift to

the world. You might, you cut yourself a

break a little bit. And I think, I think that's a

lot of us, who can identify with what you're, what you're saying.

We don't cut ourselves a break many times if we're shouldering

the responsibility of a family and you got stresses in the

family, if we're feeling stressed.

What? We're don't want to burden the

family with that stuff, we don't want to burden our friends.

We don't want to. And I mean, that you got these

guys that are living quiet lives of desperation.

I don't how many times on this podcast.

We've used that phrase where these, you know and you you

encapsulated it. So perfectly here, you got this

guy who on the surface, like there are people, I'm not being

hyperbolas by saying, there are people who would look at you.

Jordan say I want to fucking be that guy.

He's jacked whole man. The girls must Is love a look

what he can do and look at what he can do and just use this

larger than life. Kind of the superhero, kind of

guy come to life. And imagine if those guys

realize that that guy they're looking at has worthiness

issues, you know, like if I'll say this, I've watched you

perform. If you've got worthiness issues,

oh my God, it's okay. For all of us to have worthiness

issues and and and it's a it's actually a bit of a natural

thing. Unfortunately, what's happening

is you got a lot of guys were bottling that shit up and We're

going to get to vulnerability because I mean, you know, I

talked we talked before before the red light went on and and

because they're not being vulnerable, that shit, it Stacks

up. We push it down and push down,

push it down, but it comes back up and it, and it comes out,

unfortunately, in horrible ways is, you know, can be violent.

It can be Health shit. That pops up, heart attacks and

and and stroking out and, and then it can be some insane

horrible psychological and mental.

Cool ways that can really make existence difficult.

You've seen it, you've got it, you've got some rock bottom

moments top. Can we can we go into it?

Can we talk about your your path?

That is Led from where you were then to where you are now open

book. No problem.

I was saying that no problem, no problem.

So so when I started my career at 23, I was a total pushover

and this is all because of like just insane amounts.

From never being seed, never being heard, never really

feeling. Like I was loved, whatever.

The case I'm like, again I'll preface by I was constantly by

saying, that's no one's fault because everyone's running their

own programs. But like that was my story,

right? Like, I never really felt like I

was worth anything, so I would let people bully me pick on me,

just do. I like, whatever the case, like

I would just like, just gotta get through this.

I'm the funny guy who just dismantles people's anger at me

by funniness and like, I would that crossed over to the

wrestling business and like in wrestling business, you kind of

have to have a thick skin. You have to be like strong

whatever and I was just the most intense pushover, that anyone

can see like I was scared of everything.

I was terrified of getting heat and heat is like getting in

trouble I guess by like wrestlers are like doesn't it

correctly gossip? You you get afraid of the gossip

because for a variety of reasons, I don't want to make

anyone mad like that. So I would let everyone push me

around and like when I started using steroids, that's when I

went to the other end. It's like, well, now I'm the

psycho now, everything that everyone has ever done to me

including my upbringing. Now I'm gonna bring it out on.

And that even tries to bully me or push me around in the

slightest. And it's like that turned into,

like, okay. So I'm I've always I used

chronic we need to like, I smoked weed like most of my life

because I was trying to hide it from myself and my traumas, and

my story and like all this stuff, right?

Like I wasn't proud of where I've been where I come from all

this. So when I started using

steroids, then I started trying other things.

And like I started like doing every drug.

I could find more less and like that.

Put me on a very destructive path where around like 28 when I

told You that like I started like turning my life around

because that, that from 25 to 28, I was smoking weed.

Every day I was doing MDMA as much as I wanted, I was doing

coke. I smoke crack, I did math, I've

done like every drug. You can think of doing.

Like I was just, wouldn't it. When I started using drugs,

constantly to decide for myself, then I hit a guy adopted a

mindset of, like, okay, I'm just gonna go and tell him 28.

I'm gonna party as hard as I can until that age and I don't

really have a vision past that. So then I just like this I was

so ingrained in my traumas and I was like I'm just gonna party

myself to death, really holy shit.

Like that was conscious thought that you had yes and no.

Like I did admit it to myself one time I think when I was

like, at my like, my mom's getting to my lowest but I just,

I just wanted to just go as hard as I could.

I wanted to be that guy, like I want to just go out looking like

a tough guy, who handled everything and when it's hard as

he could and yeah it put me into a dark place and then like 28,

my nephew was born and I was also injured at the same time.

Like, I had two hernias, so I was literally just like forced

to sit on my coat and do nothing and then my nephew was born to

and like that, I can honestly say that my nephew was the

person that like reignited, my like want to live and like who

Embrace a new side of me or heal myself, I guess.

But until that time like I was just like partying and being a

total dipshit and I would I would do blow every weekend.

I was one of my lowest times ever in that 20. 25 to 28.

I recall smoking crack with a homeless guy, behind a

supermarket like like the stupid things like that, right?

Like I was just the dumbest person and like, it wasn't my

fault. I was just trying to hide for my

life, but around 28, when I started to like I just had

burned all my bridges and wrestling.

I just out asshole to myself out of the business and like I

totally understand. I was a jerk to everyone, right?

Like, but then I was like, left alone.

Like, I had no one, I had nothing.

And it's like, I saw that little guy born and I was like, I got

to be there for this kid because I can't just like let the same

thing happen to me happened to him.

We're just doesn't, have anybody?

That's cool to hang out with them not to say like Doesn't

have family around him but like, no.

It was a another person, who, like, I had a lot of, I don't

know what the word to say is, but like, I guess like made a

lot of mistakes, whatever. But I could help him, not make

those same mistakes. And like, that was another

person that I could, like, show love to and give the love that I

hadn't really received. So, it's totally purpose.

It's 100% of gave you a purpose that you hadn't had previously

and a new definition of purpose, safe to say?

Yeah, very much so. And like little by little after

I had that surgery I was like I'm just going to spend every

single day making the tiniest steps possible to get back to

where I want to be and like so I was like heal from the surgery,

then it's like, okay, now I'm going to start getting into the

gym and then once I started getting the amount of like,

wait, I guess we're like the look that I wanted back because

I had like withered away to like skinny little man.

Just doing drugs all the time. Yeah.

And then I was like, I just once I got to the place where I

wanted to physically, then I started like working on.

Like okay. Now I'm just going to sit down

and watch wrestling and from like 20 17 to 20 of 2017. 19 out

of the, whatever, the case, I spent three years, just sitting

on my couch for almost 10 hours a day, watching wrestling.

Because I was like, I'm just gonna become the best at this.

Now, like I have to, I can either sit at home and be

stagnant and hate my life, and be where I was before, or I can

just work as hard as I can to become what I want to be.

And like, that it very much did reignite my life.

And like that's what started like when I started to embrace

myself and love myself and it's funny to like I was sitting in

my house around like 20 20 19, and I was I was doing mushrooms.

All the time because it was like an organic drug.

And I wanted to like get back into like looking to myself with

like a with a non synthetic drug that I hadn't done before.

Yep. Like I was just sitting in my

house doing push-ups while I was watching wrestling and I just

looked into the mirror and I looked into my eyes and I'm

like, I'm the fucking best. I'm like, I deserve everything

in life. I deserve like all the things

that I've ever wanted in life and it just ignited.

Another thing, it was just like one more spark in the ignition

of like wanting to get back to myself.

And once I started telling myself that and feeling that

like, it wasn't shortly, After that I started winning all the

Championships around and I had four belts on me and then I had

five and then I got a spot and it's a bit of a movie and then

shortly after that I was on, WB Smackdown as like a I guess soon

as I started to believe that I deserve these things and like it

was with accumulated work, and that work was self-love the

right. It was like, I'm going to do all

these things because I love myself and I deserve these

things and like, I deserve all the things I've ever wanted.

They started actually coming to me like rapidly was like, bang,

bang, bang, bang, bang things, beautiful, you know, and I want

to, I want to make sure we do. Get lost in the Weeds on

something like this. If a wrestling promoter is

willing to have you as a representative to the point

where they wrestle for and and win the championship belt of

that promotion, a promoter isn't going to put somebody in the

position to be even working with the champion of that promotion,

never never mind, if they become the champion and become the

representative of that promotion.

I mean attitude is probably every bit as important as the

work ethic in the ring for those types of things to happen and

for you to be a champion of multiple promotions, it

certainly shows that you haven't, you had an attitude.

That was, you know, collaborative and thought and

definitely you thought of yourself to carry yourself that

way for others to see that you've got to believe in

yourself. Would that be four hundred

percent and like, I did jump around there.

Like, I get very excited talking about it now because, like, it's

all it's very exciting stuff, right?

Like to like, sherbet roads, were making all this stuff, but

also, when I was like, taking those steps to like, heal

myself, physically, mentally, it's sort of like watching

wrestling and whatever. The case, I also started to,

because I had to come back to wrestling, right?

Because I took the only during that time in which I was at,

like, my lowest funny enough and like, again, this is why I say

that you and like Rizzo were somewhat, like, The Guiding

lights. You were the only guys that

would book me in the only guys that like showed me love.

So it's like, that, that kind of, like, save me to write like

that. Year span from like 2015 to

2017, where I was just at my lowest, being a total idiot, the

time in which you guys would use me.

And book me, like, obviously, I would never be messed up.

Well, I'm wrestling, I would Irish wrestling team work

provide. But during that time, like, I

really had no one and I had nothing like I had my, my one

friend who's never gave up on me, who's Kevin?

Daniel Adonis, he's the one guy that's always been like there

for me. But aside from that, I would say

you guys were the only ones that helped me but because I had

burned every bridge and like made an ass out of myself to

everybody along with helping myself and loving myself and

getting My place back to her where I wanted to be, I had to

like start mending fences and building bridges in like

extending help and to every person that like wanted or

needed it. Like if I saw somebody that was

like having a hard time getting bullied, where were the case?

I would go over and help me like anything you need any time.

So I started opening my doors to any person that ever needed any

kind of like help. So I kind of gained a reputation

for being like that guy that will help you and like help you

like see through the problems that you need or breakthrough

where you need to and wrestling. And because I always had a mind

for wrestling not to, like, talk myself up but I know I'm I've

got a genius mind when it comes to wrestling.

I don't know anything outside of wrestling but I'm a genius in

wrestling. So I would use that to help

people and like because of that I kind of got a reputation of

like again like helping people and people saw that like

promoter saw that and like, obviously I was working on

myself in terms of like my in ring I was laser focused.

I was finally starting to embody what I'd always believed that I

could and like people started seeing that noticing that and

then putting Faith behind me, putting faith in me.

And then, yeah, before I knew it, I had everything I ever

wanted and is like, I don't really see many people around

here that can have 45 belts at a time.

Like I said, there's not a lot of promotions necessarily easy,

right? And like the Pacific Northwest

is kind of like, the black hole of wrestling that we're kind of,

in our own little bubble here. So, to win the money belts, that

quickly was kind of unheard of and like, it just made me feel

like, okay. I literally, I have the power

within me and I can do these things.

Like an I can take what I want in this life, because I deserve

it, but again, I hadn't got to my traumas yet, but that was my

first step of like, if I love myself and I show myself what I,

what I want and take My wand and know that I can take it, then I

can take it and I got it. Well I got a few reai.

Few reactions to what you just said number one.

Yeah. We're not even talking about the

time where you've, you know you've had some some some other

eye-opening experiences since then.

But again they're all stepping stones that lead to this, right?

I want to go back to when you said you would burn Bridges with

everybody and all that. And I appreciate you saying that

about us and what not, we always came from the perspective and

then this is this is a life thing for me.

I don't enjoy. Ting under gossip and pretense

and and and and I also don't enjoy when somebody tries to

assassinate somebody's character, especially if it's

one that I don't have that experience with that person.

So, so for you and us, you never burned a bridge with us, you

never you never did anything. In fact there was a time where I

think we'd use you two or three shows in a row and I think you

were off one of the, the next shows you showed up and you just

showed up at the say, hey, how's it going?

And shake hands. And and if you got a place for

me to be a part of it and I, you know, I just from that

perspective for me, you always had the attitude of somebody who

was a hustler and going for it and what not?

And if Bridges were being burdened other places we

certainly, you know, didn't you never burn a bridge with us?

So so, you know, for guys out there who are in that in that

place right now, where you think the whole world might be against

you, it's not necessarily the case and And just go and start

being a better version of yourself and see what doors are

actually still open. So I wanted to make sure I

respond that way because that's a two-way street and Jordi.

It really is and you never, we always loved you.

And again, you always put on such a good show, you are the

man. When it comes to this stuff, I

love how you started talking about the generosity and giving

and whatnot. You know, there's a Zig Ziglar

quote out there where you say that says, if you help other

people accomplish your goals and dreams, you'll accomplish Goals

and dreams and that's and I think that that's a life thing.

I don't think that necessarily has to translate to specific

things it might. But but at the end of the day

there's there's no feeling that feels so good then to help

others and the the selfishness from it or the seemingly

selfishness part, is you get your cup filled by helping to

fill other people's cups. And I know you live.

That I know that's who you are and that's what's in your heart

and I appreciate that about you. So you've got You know, you've

got these belts, all the stuffs happening covid hits and and

we're getting into that we're getting into that that that age

of 33 here. Where there's been some

breakthrough moments. You were walking along the path

along the way you were seeing Improvement, recognizing

overcoming, some of the things that yourself built for you, the

obstacles that you self imposed on yourself and you've had some

moments in our you've smashed through those obstacles.

What else? Let's let's let's keep moving

forward. To the closer to the present.

So January 2020. Yeah.

I was like, yeah, yeah. Uh, January 2020.

I was in a table or a four-way Tables, Ladders and Chairs

match. And it was like, when I was just

like, I was, I had taken everything I've ever wanted.

Like I was on top of the world and like I had like a meteoric

rise in a sense. Right?

Like around in DC and like I just went from like midcard.

Nobody eat. I was on the top of the card

everywhere. Yeah and I got was in a fatal,

four-way TLC match. And in that match I it was It

was a very stupid like it anything that happened in

wrestling, right? Like it's way she goes and I

don't blame anyone for it because like I put my.

So you put yourself in the position to have these things

happen to you. But so there was me and this

guy, we were sitting beside each other.

Another wrestler, we're in the middle of the match.

We're five minutes in and there's a ladder place like

right here along us, right? And like, it's on the center of

my sternum and I had my arms up and like, to protect myself,

just because it's a ladder coming down to you, got to be

smart, right? Like I should have put my arms

down here and it was two people that were over 200 pounds.

Be under 50 pounds, right? They both, Down on the same time

and it caved in my chest. And it was literally, the worst

like worst pain I've ever felt. And I had to, I didn't have to,

but I'm not going to not finish the match.

So I wrestled 15 more minutes with it.

And like, it was fucked up, man. It was brutal.

If there was a literal dent in my chest, and it's the worst

pain I've ever felt in my entire life.

And that was the, the absolute Catalyst right there of to,

like, what awoke me from my unconsciousness.

But so I caved in my chest and I finish the match.

I had, I was on WB Smackdown, two weeks after that, and the

cool thing about That not like everything is like just magic

over. Makes anything everything works

as a supposed to flood. So my entire life, since I was

5, the only thing I wanted to do was get on WWE TV and Beyond

every TV and BMW recent with. All right?

Yeah, so I got some Talent or some extra work with them either

be and I got to be on the actual show on Smackdown like a, my

first time. They're like, it's just so cool.

I was security guard and I had a caved in chest.

This is the funny part, it's not funny, but I had a physical

couple days before that. And I had a caved in chest at

the time and I had Act like I didn't hurt at all and like

there's no pain. Like a caved-in chest against

the. It's when you breathe, when you

sneeze, when you lay down, I couldn't sleep.

I couldn't breathe properly for months, and I had to pretend

like I had no pain cuz I'm not missing this opportunity so it

comes to the time and I have a caved-in chest.

I'm not telling anybody like I'm walking down the ramp because

we're supposed to be myself and another security guard and Braun

strowman. This really big dude who was

there at the time the idea is he runs down the ramp and like tack

pulls us and for myself like it. That's my moment right there.

Like, we're supposed to stop the guy, right?

So, I ran to him as fucking hard as I could, and I kick my feet

up and like, I went straight on my back on the, the concrete

more or less. There's a little padding in

between, but like so I hit my fucking head.

And I got a concussion on top of it because I like, I went as

hard as I could into, it's okay, then chest concussion, but it's

still like the moment I've been dreaming of so I could care less

that. Guess the thing I've been

working towards so that happens and it was amazing.

And I would do it a thousand times.

Just like, I would go through with the pain that I went

through of like healing trauma and that's not to say that I

don't have a lot of work left to do because obviously, I do,

everyone does. Yeah, but I would go like the

pain, doesn't matter, right? It's like it's the outcome that

you can working in her life for this reason, and once you get

it, it's like I don't give a fuck.

Hey, and I'll do it again, but so that happened and then a

couple weeks later the World closed down, right?

So then wrestling was taken away from me in a sense because like

and that that is literally my whole identity.

So your identity was stripped of you is how you viewed that you

were at the highest. So high that you could be the

momentum was on your side. Not even physical adversity was

stopping you from being the best you.

You could be at that time, that's how it felt and then

suddenly everything stops. And that's another thing with

that to is shortly. After that, I was supposed to go

to Alberta to wrestle a massive legend in the name of Jason, the

terrible. The guy's a psycho like Stampede

Legend crazy guy. Yeah, super cool.

Awesome. But he's fucking scary and I

knew he was going to beat my ass because he's just crazy, and

he's that kind of guy, right? But I'm not trying to say that

in like a mean non complimentary way, he's just a real ass dude

who loves to fight. But so I had a caved in chest

and a couple like shortly. Like I had a caved in chest and

also had a herniated disc in my neck and that was just from

Randomness, right? So like, I was kind of falling

apart and so wrestling was taken away from me, but before

wrestling was taken away. And before I had this Smackdown

stuff, I Wait. It might have been shortly

after. Yeah.

Okay. So but a convergence of events

was happening in your life to basically be the Catalyst for

what was going to happen. Yeah.

So like wrestling was taken away.

I was just kind of like left to my own devices to like just be

in the immense amount of pain that I had and sorry the

caved-in chest came before the herniated disc in my neck that's

when wrestling started back up again.

Yeah, but though I had a caved in chest, it was the worst

literal pain I've ever felt in my life.

Life and for three months, that's how long it took me to

pop it back out. And like, I didn't go see a

doctor because like, they're just going to tell me, not to

like wrestle. And even though I'm not

wrestling, right? I'm just, I'm gonna power

through what I'm going to tough guy it, right?

So, I actually popped it out myself and like it was, it was

horrible because sneezing was the worst pain I ever felt

because it would like, pop the little bones out little by

little. So it's like, every time I

sneeze do but like, a little pop, little pop little pop and

yeah, like, it was absolutely terrible.

Here's the funny thing, in that sense like I popped it out to

the point where there was one part that really Still hurt and

it was like a tiny bone. But I knew that if I just like

pushed on it as hard as I could, that I would pop it back out.

So one night I was at home and there's no wrestling.

So I'm just sitting there watching wrestling like normal.

So I just started dancing and I'm like, I know that if I just

attack this part and just like, do the motion like while dancing

that like a tax, it that it would eventually fix itself and

like it hurt to the point where I started crying and I like

sitting there like cry dancing, just like pushing myself and

then at one point like just pushed it as hard as I could it

pop back out and I'm like all the pain is gone.

Like it literally it's fixed. And it was like I was like if

you the pure, the cure for the pain is in the pain, in some

sense is like, so I just I just pushed it until it was, it was

fixed and lick. That was my chest and they don't

try this at home, kids whole new recommended.

Wow. Okay, wow.

All right, so your ailments your homeopathic remedy happen to

work in this case. I listen to my, I've been able

to always listen to my body, even though like my mind was

always loud, but I've always had this kind of like knowing of

where my body needs to go to write help it.

I guess that's from wrestling, like being in tune with your

body because like we're almost always wrestling with some sort

of injury, right? And so like we're going to learn

how to work around it and you listen to your body, whatever

the case. But so with that and I don't

mean to cut you off if you have something.

No, no, you're good, you're good.

You keep going. But so II happen to fix that but

I was still left with the. I have no identity now.

I don't know who I am. I am and Jordi outside of

wrestling has always been. So trauma riddled that.

I didn't feel worthy outside of the Ring.

I only felt worthy when I was in the ring.

I only felt like I was the man in the ring.

So like I had two different. Personas one was like this guy

that I never looked at and like I, when I thought about like,

buying new clothes, buying, whatever the case it was always

like, I'm gonna buy new wrestling girl, but I think

about this for my wrestling guy. Yeah.

And then I had to like oh here's real Jordy.

Here's the guy that no one cared about I didn't care about.

I've never seen because I was never shown To see myself.

So I never saw myself in his like, then I had to like start

getting to know me and then that's when the initiation into

trauma without being told that I had traumas kind of started.

But it was. Yeah, it was probably the like

when I was doing drugs and being an idiot around 28, that was a

low but this was like the lowest of low because it was like now I

really have to get into the pain and I can't mask it.

Imma fucking to, like, do drugs, whatever the case.

But one of the coolest things I ever had happened was that was

January. And so, So I got my timelines

mixed up, so that was January and then I had all this time in

which I had to get to know myself again.

And it was, it was extremely beneficial in the sense that I

finally learned to see myself a little bit.

But so wrestling starts, back up months later and I start

wrestling again here and there. However, I can.

Yeah. And I herniated a disc in my

neck. And so, that was like, when I

caved in my chest, I had like shocks running through my arms

and my legs at all times. And I was losing crank all the

time. And this is another thing too,

though. This this adds the story, this

is the part that I messed up because I could it all just was,

it's been like a blur for the last few years, right?

Up like cool thing, painful thing, sure.

But I caved in my chest and it was the Catalyst to get to that

little bone. I was talking about where I

popped it back in. But so, wrestling started back

up again. And this is before I popped it

back in. I was at a show on the island of

Vancouver Island and I was about to win a belt that night.

So, I had two matches and the first match I was like, I have

to Take it easy because I still have a caved-in chest and I feel

really fucked up and five minutes into the match.

I got pinned hard and it made my chest even worse.

So I hadn't finished that match. I finished the next match and

then I went to my sister's house, and as I was laying in my

sister's house, I was in the most pain I've ever been in to

the point where I was, I thought I was in shock, right?

Cuz I was like, yeah, I was sitting there and I was like,

adjusting myself being like, if I just move this tweak, this

something will happen. Yeah.

And then my chest, like fixed itself a tiny bit, but this is

before, like, it was totally Fixed.

But if it's this up a little bit but since your sternum plate is

connected to your, your your spine, the ribs connect.

I felt it fix on the front but then I fell to go into my back

and down my back went numb. So like, oh my God, yeah my

back's numb, my next numb and like I'm losing fucking pain and

I'm losing feeling on everything and it was just like I sat there

that night and I was like, I don't think I'm gonna wake up

tonight or tomorrow morning. So I'm like, if I wake up, then

I really hope that I get to. But if I don't then I guess that

lived a nice life and I really hope my sister hasn't come to

the couch and find me here. Laying here is like a stupid

question. Why aren't you calling the

ambulance? Why aren't you at that point?

They're submitting to the idea that maybe you need a little bit

of help outside of the hope and a prayer.

I mean obviously it worked out but I'm just curious what it

was. Is it pride?

Is it? Is it?

What is it that stops you from from that?

I identified so hard as being a wrestler and like I still do to

an extent. Like I've come full circle to

the point where I know that I am a wrestler, like, I've But I

want to say that without jumping too far ahead.

Well, I didn't want to stop wrestling.

I knew like, I had like a lot of matches coming up and so like

around that time. So it was January 2020.

When I had my chest caved in it was right after that, in

February. When I was on, WE Smackdown.

I spent the next few months. Healing myself, and then

wrestling started back up again. Yeah.

And so my chest was still, like, my chest was fine, but my spine

was fucked up because I like popped it back.

I popped it into my chest and like, here's the weird thing.

So, I felt my back, like the, the disks or whatever.

I felt like it. Like, work itself up every disc.

So I pop one part of the disk, the next one to move, and I pop

one part of the disc and the next one is moved and eventually

got to the point where, like, right here in my soul, I felt

like a creek there like a like a like a, it was like I try.

So I always like this, I would pop it and I would snap it and I

knew that I had the papa to fix it.

But like so it was like, I popped that part of my chest and

then I pop Then in my spine and then so I was wrestling semi

frequently and then that was that night that I fucked my

chest up even more. So yeah it so that like that

fucked it up to more so and I didn't again I didn't want to

stop wrestling right? Because I had that massive

Jason, the terrible and this is where the timeline I kind of

messed it up. But yeah.

Later on in the year I was supposed to wrestle Jason, the

terrible. And that's when things are

stopped again. So I was about, was set to fly

to Calgary, even though I had a herniated disc in my neck, I had

a fucked-up back because there was another disk that was fucked

up. I was like, I'm gonna get the

chance to wrestle. This legendary guy.

Why, right? So I can't I can't not do that

but luckily probably beneficial for me.

That the flight got canceled because they closed the world

down again for a second time. More or less, right?

Stop the things again. Yeah.

So then I was again, just left to sit there and like I was

sitting with my family just in all this pain and like I had to

wrestle the week after but it was local like it wasn't like

interpreter wasn't provincial. Like it wasn't the fly, whatever

the case. Let's so I was about wrestling

Vancouver Island again and my neck was fucked up.

And like my back was fucked up and I was just There with my

family and like it goes back to my nephew again because he was

older by now, obviously, the city with them.

And I'm like I he was asking me to pick him up and I didn't have

the strength to pick him up. So I was like, she's like trying

to and try to pretend that I don't have any pain and I don't

want to tell my family that goes back to trauma two, right?

Where I was like, I don't feel worthy in the sense of like

telling people. My story, my problem.

So I'm just going to like suck it up and be quiet and like just

just men through the pain. Yeah, and so I was I was sitting

there thinking to myself I'm like I'm probably going to spend

the rest of my life in a wheelchair from this point on.

And I'm going to have to retire from wrestling because like, I

was, I was set that I was going to tell the promoter that I was

going to wrestle for like days later because I couldn't feel

like my limbs. I was like, I'm probably gonna

have to retire. So I just like sat there and

like surrendered and this is the first time I've ever truly

surrendered and I just told myself as like I'm surrounded by

love, I have love everywhere. No matter what.

Like this is the story that I've been given, this is the path.

I'm supposed to be right here, doing this experiencing, this

pain and like, no matter what, if I'm not supposed Be a

wrestler then maybe I can be a manager.

Maybe, I can still do something. Like there's still, there's

still a purpose that I can live here and like I have my nephew

here of my family here, they're still love everywhere.

So I just have to be grateful. And the cool thing was it was

like not five days later because I had to wrestle the next

weekend. I was at work and because like

dancing funny thing enough to when you dance you like you move

stuck, energy throughout your body and my body.

It would kind of just told me to do that.

So I was like, I learned to isolate my neck, like, with,

with like the isolations for dancing.

So I did that and I Like pushed the bone this way and I kind of

met in the middle and it popped my neck back in when I was at

work. And I was like, I literally

surrender a couple days before telling myself that I'd be fine

and then they, they fit like they pop back into place and

they were good. And it's like, I don't have any

pain at all anymore. The pain, like the shooting

fucking feeling of my rent, my arms, and my limbs had stopped.

And I was just, I was good. And it's like I told me like as

soon as I like surrender and stop destroying a force

everything. Then I kind of got my dream back

and was it was one of the most beautiful things ever and who

training, Jordy, you're like fucking Wolverine.

How Your body has the ability to pop its bones back into the

place and put itself in danger, not.

And I were going to go get the healing factor in there and I

mean, I'm not trying to make light of it.

It's crazy. How how that happened?

So was that moment where you realized that there is world a

world outside of at that point what you would constructed?

I mean and there's so many guys who wrap their entire identity

around what they do for a living.

Or their position in their family, the father or husband,

or whatever a duty of some sort. And when you surrender, you talk

about this moment of surrender and how it's not about the

wrestling. It's about all the things that

you were present in that moment and grateful for was there a

catalyst for that? Or it?

Was it just the universe? Just saying, okay, here you go.

It's for you or did you read something to you?

What was the AHA? What was the Catalyst for the

aha moment? Is it just the fact that you

were coming to grips with the fact that you were taking stock

that you actually did have a lot more than wrestling?

Is that is that really what it was?

It was literally just sitting in my sister's living room sitting

with my nephew after I had thrown him up and like, was like

playing with them. I was just sitting with all of

them and he was just asking me to play and I'm like there was

so much love around me. I'm like, how can I not be

appreciative of this and not think about the things that I

don't have in terms of like wrestling?

Like I've lived in awesome wrestling career, even to that

point and I was like, I have literally nothing but love

surrounding me. So how can I not be grateful,

right? And like when I did that, like

when you're, when you were in your grateful, you open yourself

up to Miracles, right? Like you become like on the

vibration for miracles to happen and like I did, that's the thing

is like when I started to just feel the love and love myself

and love what was around me and again, that was right before I

was like, before I started a tackling traumas and like when I

started getting embodying love and feeling loved and letting

myself feel it. So, I guess it was one of the

first times my heart opened. Then that's what happened is.

Like, it was just that moment is like, Sparkle of everywhere.

What am I doing? I would submit that.

You needed to be in this place in order to truly tackle.

The traumas. Yeah, 100%.

I guess. Just, you know, you're another

one of those Stepping Stones were talking about.

Yes sir. Yeah.

I I I love you for having this moment you talk you you know a

lot of folks don't necessarily hear pro wrestlers or guys who

you know have that that stereotypical male testosterone

persona. Talk like this and it's one of

the, it's one of the reasons why, you know, when you and I

reached out a few days ago and I like I want to have guys like

you on this podcast all the time to break through and to talk

about these moments of Awakening and awareness.

And it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside or the

actions of what you have done. When these, when these moments

happen and these moments of awareness show up and we pay

attention and we lean into them and we actually do something.

It's even if it's a baby step at a time to lean into those

moments. How much better Our Lives can

be? I say that myself included, I've

got my own that I've got to lean into as well and it's hearing

guys talk about this stuff. There are so many guys out there

who hear this and will it take this and internalize it and and

the gratefulness I think I think you're exactly right.

Gratefulness is a silver bullet for anxiety.

It's a silver bullet for for when you're uncertain about.

Out things gratefulness is one of those.

It's, it is a silver bullet. It's so important.

And when you have that, and there's so many things that we

can be grateful for that we just overlooked and we're not were

not present and we're not aware and and for you to talk about

this and how it's a simple Act of awareness of the love around

you and how suddenly that it becomes a that Avalanche that we

were talking about. So what did it lead to?

So what traumas have you lean into?

What Awakenings, have you found since that moment?

I mean, it's a, it's been a mountain.

I like I've, I've never really seen myself and like, from that

time that wasn't that was more. So just like getting to awaken

in a sense of like learning that I had all these traumas and then

like I started like I funny enough like I started to like

tell myself but like I deserve wonderful things.

I deserve a wonderful life and I started talking to the universe,

right? Like I started like like having

a conscious conversation at all times mean like Be guidance.

Where am I supposed to go next? What is, what's the next thing

that's for me? And like, just, like I would

affirm that, like, I'm destined for love.

I'm a destine for, like, everything that I've ever wanted

in the so, like I the next thing I said, was like, I want to have

a loving partner like a conscious partner, weight of the

case and lo and behold like a few months later, a woman that I

had a crush on in high school ended up just stumbling in front

of me and was like not like literally but like it's like she

crossed your path like I got That is like, the more I look

back, the more I realized that I had been given everything I've

ever asked for like, that was another thing.

And the like, then like wrestling just started, like

piling up with more cool experiences, more cool

opportunities. And like before I know it, like,

now I'm the man around here like now, I have everything I do.

Like I do the things that I love all the time.

My life is literally just filled with love, but like, during the

things, the traumas that I hadn't liked tackled that I have

now is like, not being seen as I had to start looking at like

They'll feel like seeing myself and seeing that I deserve things

and like, not being, I gotta start going to stop you for a

second. If there's a guy out there right

now, who's feeling, like they're not seen, they're feeling like

they are the man who wasn't there.

What would you say to that guy? Right now, the only love that

you can, the only love you need is the love that you give

yourself, like if your inner child was never seen, it wasn't

your parents fault. It's it's nobody's fault that

they weren't able to give you what you needed.

But as an adult, it's your job to repair it yourself.

And in those moments in which you don't feel, Seen, then you

have to see yourself and like tell yourself that it was no

one's fault and like you're not unworthy, your you're worth

everything that you could ever ask for like and it's not it's

not a problem for you to take up space and take up the things

that you want in your life is like, you deserve everything.

We all deserve everything. We're just, we have so much.

Most of us are in survival mode and we don't know how to even

look at anything because we're just like, okay, how do I need

to? How do I get more food in the

house? How do I pay rent?

How do I do this thing? Like it's not like we just think

that like a when I get enough stuff.

Then I'll be happy instead of being like I just need to decide

to be happy and decide that I need my own.

Like I just need to love myself and know that I deserve love and

know that I deserve anything I've ever asked for.

So, like being seen, you're the only one that can see yourself

truly and we all deserve to be seen.

We all deserve to be loved, right?

That starts with using yourself. Yeah, I love that.

There's a book that I just, I adore called The Power of Now,

by Eckhart Tolle and Love someone.

It's such a it's such a it will make you question the way that

you interpret, everything that goes on in your life, including

what your head tells you and and it gives you tools to kind of

separate yourself from those things and and how you can in

those moments become still and become president and it's it is

a phenomenal tool that can be used and Outlook.

So I want to I want to be cognizant of time.

We're in an hour and 10 minutes and I want to I want to make

sure that we're you know, not taking too much time for our

viewers and listeners but at the end of the day, the

transformation that you have you have gone through from who you

were to who you are now and it's funny, you know, it's I'm going

to, I'm going to be kind of literal here, literally talking

from like like, you know, picture the the the

quintessential athlete in your mind of Ballplayer or what, a

testosterone-fueled individual, you know, over to kind of a Zen,

kind of a Zen, kind of guy, what, not that.

I've watching that happen with you, take us to take us home on

the journey as to where you are now.

One of the things that we haven't explored yet in this

journey here Jordi because it's amazing, the transformation that

has happened in you. The blessings that have come

from it, please please. Yeah, take us to take us.

Take us home in that Journey. That means A lot and I'm sorry

if I talk in jumbles because like there's a bunch of

different timelines. Whatever the case that I we're

good, if there's a bunch of going on.

But anyways, like nowadays, I just now I'm just like, and I'm

not to say that I'm perfect. Everyone still learning, I'm

still learning, but like now, I'm more present than I've ever

been. When something comes up and it

obviously still gets me sometimes.

But like, when something comes up now it's like, okay, what is

this trigger coming up? Like what have I not reconciled

with in my inner child? Like my inner child leading to

be seen in this moment. It's needing to be heard.

Well, There's the things come up.

There are teachers, right? Like when we're having emotions

come up. We're having feelings or

whatever. The case, I get something trying

to tell us like something that we weren't validated with as a

child. And the only thing about

location, we're going to get is by ourselves.

So like now I really just love my life.

Like I know that everything that happens to me, is exactly what's

meant to happen to me for my highest good and like I live

dream. Like my life is amazing.

Like I went from like smoking crack and meth to being like now

my life is amazing. I don't need to hide for

anything and like I did do all those drugs and whatever the

case so I could hide for myself and now Like, I don't want to

hide from myself now. I just want to be right here

living. This magical thing that I have,

which is my life. I'm like I said, the more I do

that, the more like I literally just get everything that I want,

because I'm always in the, the vibration for miracles in my

life is a giant Miracle which is wonderful.

It's phenomenal to hear this Geordi.

I read something. I forget where it was.

We're with the where it was it. I read it.

But actually, you something like candy, it's something that she

wants to help incorporate into the heat change to adapt,

actually. Talking about fear and how fear

if we could look at it, we can identify it.

And if we can put a filter on when we recognize that we are

afraid, or that were uncertain and we say, okay, well what if

this is a gift from the universe meant to teach me something and

you you kind of alluded to that. Um, and it just reminded me of

what candy was saying and how, what if we as men every single

time? Something that brings up

anxiety. Something that brings up, fear,

whatever. What if we could kind of

separate ourselves from the emotion and analyze it and go.

Okay, what's it trying to teach me?

Was it trying to make me deal with from the past you talk

about the inner child? And I mean you know it's funny

childhood traumas childhood trauma, it doesn't it doesn't

have to be that we were physically or mentally abused or

something like that. It could be the way that someone

looked at us wrong on the playground on that day and how

we interpreted it that day. And it created a block of some

sort that can affect us now and only by analyzing like what you

just said like how can this teach me?

What is it trying to tell me? What is this a result of asking

those questions? Jordy, you're a changed guy.

Like you have a very different Outlook than you did and I'm

astounded by it. And and you talking about some

of these behaviors and some of these thought patterns that you

have now certainly are filling in gaps as to how you've made

such a radical mental change. Do you think that that mental

change that adjustment is possible for any guy out there?

Any guy like we're all the same? Really like we all have the same

traumas and not all Typically the same, but we all have the

same challenges. We're all facing challenges, we

all feel Sadness. The same, we all feel love the

same. We all have the same strength

within us. Everybody has the ability to do

it. It's just whether they're

willing to love themselves enough to make that change.

And like a lot of it is, we don't feel safe because we're

not taught how to feel safe, right?

Like but when those things come up, all we have to do not get,

it is my thing. But like I guess the thing that

I do is like I tell myself like I'm safe, I got safe to feel

this. I'm safe to work through this.

I'm safe in my skin right now and like we're not what our

traumas. Gave us like we're we can choose

who we are every day, right? Like we can choose to run our

patterns and run the things that like that we had coming up like

throughout our lives. Or we can be right here right

now and accept everything that's happened to us and then like,

just choose to live choose to love and choose to be grateful.

I've got two things that I want to, I want to bring up and then

I want to take her home if that's okay.

The the first thing is well the second thing is going to be how

do people get in contact with you cuz I think that's really

important. But the first thing, NG before I

do that, when you found out about what my wife and her team

are building this men's mental Wellness platform, this app

prevention in your pocket, they like to call it these tools that

we want to be give for guys to equip them with these skills

that you have learned through the School of Hard Knocks.

When you heard about he changed the, he changed it out.

What is it about that? That's got you.

So excited, it's literally every guy needs like a we're all

taught to be strong, be tough being, whatever the case.

But like in order to be vulnerable, which we all need to

We need to start diving into our things and like, like that's

literally what you're providing is like we all have hard times

and hard lives but like the change comes from within and the

only one that's going to love yourself and give yourself that

changes you. And like you're giving that

awareness. You're giving platform for

people to talk about that same kind of change that they've had

right? Like not only is it wonderful to

listen to but it's also amazing to and therapeutic to get it off

your chest. Like I've never really told the

story of like my upbringing, right?

So like it's just as therapeutic for me to be able to like get it

out finally. Right.

Right. It's, it's beautiful.

At the biggest freedom to have. Yeah, its freedom.

I me and it's funny. The ironic part about it is we

try and, you know, man up by staying tough and not bring it

up and all that. But but really you show that

you're tough by being able to be vulnerable.

That's the ironic part about the whole thing.

The much though, it's a mind. Fuck, isn't it, man?

Like the things that lead to success are the things that

naturally, you know, it's not necessarily intuitive until

you've gone through it and once you Through it it's like oh my

God, how many years did I spend? In your case, you know, not

giving yourself credit for even being there not being seen

goddamn, I mean there's so many guys that that are in that place

right now and we want to help and that what's what leads me to

you are a guy that wants to help.

And at the end of the day, this app in this movement is all

about guys being able to help each other.

We're not therapists, but we're brothers for each other and we

can and that helps that's a lot of the time.

And again, we're not for Those who have have real severe,

things that need to be dealt with, by the, by the proper

channels. Go deal with those things, you

know. But but when it comes to what

the goal for this for this movement is, is, you know, you

do a lot of yoga, guess what chances are, you're not going to

have to go to the doctor for a lot of cardiovascular things and

and or or muscle things or that that being said, it's

preventative. And that's what this movement is

here, where guys can actually talk about this stuff and It can

prevent having to deal with worst things.

Down the line Jordi is a helper Jordi.

At the end of the day, you're still doing what you're doing.

You're out there. If somebody wants to attach

themselves to you or look at what you're doing or reach out

to you, what's the best way to do that?

Jody Taylor on Facebook Jo, RDI, etay Lor, on Facebook.

I'm that's where I mostly on stuff.

Inner-city Mystic is my Instagram and the best pro

wrestlers, my other Instagram. And like that's usually where I

stay as on those. The best pro wrestler.

You're the best pro wrestler on Instagram.

I'm legitimately the best pro wrestler.

There is so I have to label it on Instagram.

When I feel like you're offering is love like it's glove to

everyone like and there isn't a situation that enough love can't

solve, right? Like love is the cure for

everything, whether it's self love, whether it's love from

someone else, trying to help you.

And I could literally all of his like, men just need to embrace

love and like embrace the love within themselves and that's how

you open your heart, right? Like that's all it is, is just

offering the gift of love. I want to finish it right there

that I don't think that there's a better excuse explanation,

exclamation point to put on there Geordi.

I love you brother and I'm so grateful that you, you know, are

are vulnerable enough to talk about this stuff.

Thank you for helping people. I'm so proud of, I hate to say

this about saying, it sounds exciting, condescending.

I'm so fucking proud of you. And and, and it's amazing to

watch where you've come from and and and and where you're going.

And I just I'm on And to be part of it Jordi, thank you very much

for taking time to be on on he casted.

And talk about this stuff. Thank you.

And I love you too, brother. Thank you for having me.

It's been wonderful. Oh, no problem.

They'll K. They finish that quickly.

They got the time goes really, really quick.

It's my favorite time of the week is, when I get to do these

things. I am very, very appreciative of

all of the support that we have gotten so far, with this, with

this, he changed to movement. You haven't seen anything yet.

I promise you that. If you haven't downloaded the

heat, change it up. What the heck?

Are you waiting for? For no matter your persuasion

whether you're an Android or an apple person search he changed

it in the app store, download it for free.

Find get the app sign on in and look at some of the resources we

have. Once again, you ain't seen

nothing yet. This has been another episode of

he cast the official podcast of he changed it.

My name is Mike Chism. Go change something.

Keep the conversation going.

Daily check-ins, practical tools, real conversations, and support built around men's mental wellness.